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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26068843">Saint and Sinner</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyricalballads/pseuds/lyricalballads'>lyricalballads</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Newsies (1992)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Moral Dilemmas, Prostitution, Strained Friendships</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 12:22:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>33,289</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26068843</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyricalballads/pseuds/lyricalballads</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a fine line between right and wrong. David thinks he has his morals all figured out, but that changes when he meets a young prostitute.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>David Jacobs/Original Female Character(s), Jack Kelly/Original Female Character(s), Sarah Jacobs/Jack Kelly</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Purity</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This was originally posted on fanfiction.net from 11/14/2011 to 7/27/2012 and is based on the 1992 movie.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She was too clean to be a street girl.</p><p>Her white skin had obviously seen soap and water, her dark blonde hair was neatly pinned back, and her green dress looked nothing like the dresses David's mother and sister wore. It was made of fine material and looked expensive, like something a society lady would wear, and her small black boots looked like they were polished on a regular basis.</p><p>But if she was dressed so nicely, then why did she need to steal from the fruit market?</p><p>David had seen her with his own eyes as he stood near the market selling papers. He supposed she thought nobody would suspect her when she looked so clean and presentable, but when he glanced out of the corner of his eye he saw two apples quickly disappear into the green folds of her skirt. David had learned a thing or two since he started selling papers and he knew that people grew desperate during hard times, but his father had drilled it into his head that stealing was a great sin, no matter how bad times were.</p><p>Perhaps if the morning's headline was a little better, David might have tried to forget the thief and focus on selling his papers, but the sight of that fruit disappearing under everyone's noses <em>bothered</em> him, like an itch that refused to go away. Besides, he had never heard of a well-dressed girl stealing food before, and his curiosity was rapidly becoming even greater than his sense of moral duty. The moment the girl in the green dress began strolling away from the market, David tucked all of his papers carefully under one arm and followed her, waiting for an opportunity to catch her alone.</p><p>That opportunity came when the passerby grew sparser and she walked more slowly, no longer bent on escaping from the fruit market. One white hand reached into her skirt as she walked and a moment later, a shiny red apple emerged.</p><p>"I would put that back if I were you," said David.</p><p>The girl stopped walking and turned to face him with puzzled blue eyes. "Put what back?"</p><p>"I know you didn't pay for those apples."</p><p>The blue eyes narrowed in suspicion. "And how would ya know that? Been spyin' on me?"</p><p>David was surprised at the street accent that came from such a clean, finely dressed girl. "I wasn't spying. I'm just curious. You don't look like someone who would need to steal food."</p><p>"Well you don't know nothin' about me. My landlady wouldn't feed me this mornin' and she withheld all my earnings, and I bet <em>you</em> would steal too if you was as hungry as I am."</p><p>Nothing about this girl made sense in David's mind. She spoke like a street girl, but she looked like a society lady, and there had to be some deeper reason why she was hungry that morning, but David couldn't imagine what it was. What kind of a landlady refused to feed one of her tenants?</p><p>"If you put those apples back, I'll buy you breakfast," David decided.</p><p>She looked more suspicious than ever. "Why?"</p><p>"Because I don't want you to be a thief, that's why."</p><p>"What's your name anyway, Mr. High-and-Mighty?"</p><p>"It's David."</p><p>"I'm Jenny," she said, taking the second apple out of her skirt. "And ya got yourself a deal."</p><p>David didn't know what possessed him to meddle in business that clearly wasn't his, but he was overtaken by an uncontrollable urge to help Jenny. Perhaps it was because she appeared to be the same age as himself, more or less, and he didn't want her to end up in the Refuge. The girls in there would steal the dress right off her back and fight over it until it ripped to shreds.</p><p>Jenny remained silent as he walked her back to the fruit market, though she kept sneaking glances at him when she thought he wouldn't notice. David briefly wondered if she had stolen her fancy dress, but dismissed that idea when she reached past him to return the stolen apples and a whiff of perfume reached his nose. She was simply too clean, unless she was a servant girl who had cleverly raided her mistress' things before going out that morning, which didn't quite add up with her mention of a landlady.</p><p>"Whatcha thinkin' about?" Jenny's voice broke through his thoughts.</p><p>"How did you know I was thinking?" he asked.</p><p>A secretive smile crossed her lips. "I'm real good at readin' a man's face. You're thinkin' real hard about somethin', ain'tcha?"</p><p>"I'm wondering why you look rich but talk like you're poor."</p><p>"Well, Mr. David, that's my little secret, if ya don't mind. Now I believe you promised me breakfast, didn'tcha?"</p><p>David may not have known where this girl had come from or why her speech didn't match her appearance, but he did know something about hungry people, and hungry people were always willing to talk once they had a bite to eat. To his surprise, Jenny slipped her arm through the crook of his elbow, like they were a wealthy couple taking a leisurely stroll in Central Park, and David would have protested if she hadn't winked at him the moment he opened his mouth.</p><p>This girl was becoming more of a mystery by the second.</p><p>"What's with the papers?" Jenny asked. "You a newsboy or somethin'?"</p><p>David found that he liked the feel of her small hand latched onto his arm, and the realization made him nervous. "Yes," he said, refusing to look at her face as they walked. "I sell the <em>World</em>."</p><p>"Well then you <em>are</em> high-and-mighty if you're sellin' the whole world."</p><p>"It's the name of the paper."</p><p>"What difference does it make? News is news, right? You sell what ya gotta sell, no matter what the name, no matter what the headline."</p><p>Something about her worldly, rather cynical tone reminded David a bit of Jack Kelly. "Sounds like you know something about paper selling."</p><p>"Oh, no," she said with a laugh. "We can't all be fine enough to be hoity-toity paper sellers like yourself. But I <em>do</em> know a thing or two about sellin'."</p><p>"Selling what?"</p><p>"Maybe I'll show ya if I'm in the mood."</p><p>David wasn't sure if he should push the conversation further, so he kept his mouth shut and promised himself to work extra hard to make up for his lost selling time. One of his favorite cheap restaurants was less than a block away and David passed a few of his fellow newsies, who gawked in surprise at Jenny as if they'd never seen a girl before. "Davey, who's the skirt?" they would say, and David was forced to walk faster when Specs and Mush tried to sell her a paper.</p><p>"Friends of yours?" Jenny asked him as he hurried away.</p><p>"Sometimes," said David, half-jokingly.</p><p>The restaurant wasn't very crowded during the late morning hour and David extricated himself from Jenny's grasp so he could hold the door open for her. Even when consorting with strangers, his parents' endless lessons of etiquette remained unforgotten and Jenny gave him a grateful smile as she glided past him, making David feel a bit lightheaded. He had to admit, she <em>was</em> pretty, even if she was an attempted thief.</p><p>Luckily for David, nobody he knew was currently in the restaurant and he settled across from Jenny at a small corner table. He hadn't gotten a chance to study her before, but now that she was right in front of him he noticed that her lips were painted a deep pink, bright against her white face, and her eyelashes were long and black, probably enhanced with cosmetics as well. The effect made her appear both older and younger at the same time, and David really didn't want to stare, but he couldn't help noticing that the neckline of her dress was lower than what he was used to seeing.</p><p>"You're thinkin' again," said Jenny. "I can see it in your face."</p><p>"What do you want for breakfast?" David asked, avoiding the question.</p><p>Her blue eyes probed into his, making that strange, lightheaded feeling return. "I'll have whatever <em>you're</em> havin'. I'm sure it's good, 'specially when it's free."</p><p>"Free for <em>you</em>," David retorted.</p><p>"I never told ya to buy me breakfast, ya know. You can still change your mind, but I guarantee I'll go right back to stealin' fruit."</p><p>A waiter came to take their orders, making it impossible for David to change his mind even if he wanted to, and he ordered the same breakfast for them both. As they sat and waited for the food he was aware of Jenny's eyes on him, studying him relentlessly, unlike any girl he had met before. "Tell me about yourself, David," she said. "We're gonna be eatin' together, so I wanna get to know ya better."</p><p>David wasn't quite sure where to begin, so he told her about his family, the tenement he lived in, and the strike over the summer, while Jenny listened raptly to every word. When the food arrived she ate with enthusiasm, and David wondered how often she went hungry but couldn't bring himself to ask.</p><p>When the meal was over and the plates were cleared away, the two of them were left staring at each other rather awkwardly. "Where are you going to go after this?" David asked.</p><p>She flashed that secretive smile at him. "Don't worry about me. You got papers to sell, don'tcha?"</p><p>"Yes. Just promise you won't steal anything, will you?"</p><p>"I promise I won't steal nothin', at least for today. Ya know, if you <em>do</em> wanna see me again, you can always come visit me. Lemme give you the directions." She borrowed a pencil from David and wrote her address in the margin of one of his newspapers, which was rather bold in David's opinion, but he supposed she was simply a bold girl in general. "Name of the landlady is Mrs. Johnson. Just tell her you'd like to see Jenny and she'll show you right up."</p><p>David had to admit that he <em>would</em> like to see her again, if only so he could unravel the mysteries that surrounded her. He thanked her for the directions, then walked her out of the restaurant and nearly groaned aloud when he saw Jack and Racetrack headed in his direction. Of <em>all</em> the people to see him with Jenny, these two were the most likely to tease him about it, and David had no choice but to smile and wave when Jack called out a greeting.</p><p>"Hiya, Davey," said Jack. "Ain't like you to take a break on the job."</p><p>"He ain't takin' a break," said Race. "Have ya seen who he's with? Our Davey's finally hopped outta the nest and tried his wings a bit."</p><p>"Are these friends of yours too?" Jenny asked David.</p><p>"Sometimes," David replied again. "Fellas, this is Jenny. I met her at the fruit market and decided to buy her breakfast."</p><p>Jenny dipped an exaggerated curtsy. "How do ya do, boys?"</p><p>"Just fine, miss," said Jack. His eyes followed her every movement, to David's slight irritation. "It's a mighty hard job carryin' the banner, but somebody's gotta do it."</p><p>"Backbreakin' work," Race agreed. "But I'm sure you know a little somethin' about that, don'tcha, Miss Jenny?"</p><p>"Perhaps," she said, smiling at him. "I imagine there are plenty of papers to be sold, so I'll leave ya to the sellin', David. Don't forget to come and see me if ya get lonely."</p><p>And with that parting statement she strolled down the street, her green dress illuminated by the morning sun, and David half-regretted letting her leave so soon. On one hand, he <em>did</em> have to sell off his papers and earn money for his family, but on the other hand, he had never met a girl like Jenny before and wished he could spend another few hours in her company. She never told him a single thing about herself, except for where she lived, and that only made her even more mysterious and achingly elusive.</p><p>"Never knew you had it in ya, Davey," Jack said once Jenny had disappeared. "Of all the fellas to pick up a girl like that, you was the last one I ever expected, but I s'pose it's always the ones ya don't expect, eh Race?"</p><p>"How much does a girl like her charge, anyways?" Race asked David. "What'd ya do, give her a free paper in exchange for a bargain?"</p><p>"What do you mean?" asked David. "I found her trying to steal some fruit, so I offered to buy her breakfast."</p><p>"Aw, come on," said Jack. "Don't tell us you don't know."</p><p>"I dunno, Jack, Dave's lived a pretty sheltered life with that family of his and all," said Race. "Maybe they never taught him to recognize a hooker."</p><p>David felt rather sick when that last word reached his ears. Of course he knew what it meant; you couldn't be a poor kid in New York and <em>not</em> know what it meant, but the thought of Jenny belonging to such a disreputable class was unthinkable. "You've got it wrong," he said. "Jenny isn't that kind of girl."</p><p>"Yeah, well ya just met her," said Jack. " 'Course ya think she's a nice girl, but I've been on these streets seventeen years, and I knows a whore when I see one."</p><p>"Open your eyes, Dave," said Race. "Why else would she be all dolled up like that? Ya see that neckline of hers? And besides, no fancy lookin' girl talks like a street rat unless she's a whore."</p><p>David wanted to deny their accusations and pretend that Jenny was simply a girl of unusual circumstances, but the evidence made far too much sense to brush aside. A deep sense of shame overtook him at the realization that he had bought breakfast for a prostitute, but even more shameful was his second realization:</p><p>He still wanted to see her again.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Vice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She didn't know why, but she almost wished he was David. He wasn't bad; in fact, he was one of the more decent ones who didn't hurt or make any strange requests, but David had been on her mind since she met him that morning and his face kept popping up in her head, even when she had another fellow's face right in front of her. She had mocked David's sense of morals and let him play the role of gentleman, though afterwards—especially times like now, when her bed springs creaked something terrible and she was forced to fake sounds of pleasure—she had a feeling that if David was with her instead, she might enjoy it a bit more.</p><p>Or at least tolerate it without putting on an act.</p><p>The fellow making her bed springs creak wasn't bad, but he was a <em>friend</em> of David's, and that just made the situation a whole lot worse. She had wanted to tease him and send him on his way, but surely Mrs. Johnson would catch wind of it and do something more severe than withholding breakfast, and she really couldn't afford to be choosy with her customers.</p><p>And yet he was David's friend, and she couldn't forget it no matter how hard she shut her eyes.</p><p>When he said her name, his accent came from hard living on the streets, just like hers. His hands were rough and stained with ink, thanks to the endless papers he hawked every day, and he was a bit clumsy at first, like he was out of practice, but his movements became smooth soon enough. A cowboy hat and a red bandana lay together on the floor, next to the crumpled folds of her green dress, and he said his name was Jack Kelly but people called him Cowboy.</p><p>Jenny thought the name suited him.</p><p>Jack finished up and rolled off of her, and still she wondered about David. He had been so kind to her, much kinder than anyone else she knew.</p><p>After fumbling about his trouser pockets for a moment, Jack lit a cigarette and sprawled on his back, exhaling smoke towards the ceiling while Jenny turned on her side and watched him. "I've never had a newsie before," she said.</p><p>"Oh yeah?" said Jack. "Thinkin' about havin' one again?"</p><p>"If ya pay me extra."</p><p>Jack chuckled and took a drag on his cigarette. "You and me think alike."</p><p>"And what's that s'posed to mean?"</p><p>"Well you and me, we ain't nothin' like David Jacobs, that's for certain. Davey's so moral, he wouldn't sleep with the likes of you even if ya didn't charge him."</p><p>"Is that so?" said Jenny.</p><p>"I'd betcha my hat he wouldn't, and I ain't usually the bettin' type."</p><p>Jack's words only made her want to see David more badly and she wanted to kick herself for her foolishness. There was no point in seeing a boy who wouldn't be worth her while, but who was to say that Jack was right? "I'll believe ya when I see it," she said, sending a lazy smile at Jack. "We're all sinners deep down, ain't we?"</p><p>" 'Cept for Davey," Jack said with confidence. "You'll see."</p><p>Jenny knew she wasn't supposed to mix with boys like David. She had been working for Mrs. Johnson for over six months now, and before that she roamed the streets selling flowers until she was seduced by the pretty dresses and makeup of the brothel, desperate for security no matter what the cost. No, girls like Jenny were exactly the sorts of girls that boys like David were warned to stay away from; the sorts of girls who were trouble since the day they were born.</p><p>The moment Jack showed up at her door, she knew the two of them were cut from the same cloth. She had grown up with boys like Jack, she entertained boys like Jack, and she would probably end up marrying a boy like Jack and live out the rest of her days in a miserable slum with too many kids, like her parents had.</p><p>She watched Jack smoking his cigarette and felt very tired all of a sudden. "If Davey's so pure, then why's he friends with the likes of you?" she asked.</p><p>"Friendship's one thing, girls is another," he replied.</p><p>"Well this girl right here can't keep you all night. You're gonna hafta pay up and scram in a few minutes."</p><p>"Yeah, yeah, Your Majesty. I'll do as ya say."</p><p>Jenny stayed in bed and watched him put his clothes back in order. She watched him belt his trousers, pull up his suspenders, and add the finishing touches of hat and bandana, knowing that once he left, her freedom wouldn't last. Tomorrow would bring another night and someone else would come tramping up the stairs to take Jack's place.</p><p>She got in trouble last evening by pleading tiredness long before the night was over. A customer came into her room and found her asleep, and when Mrs. Johnson found out she wouldn't feed Jenny due to the money she had lost out on. Mrs. Johnson wasn't cruel as far as madams went, but she hated losing out on a profit and punished her girls whenever they displeased her.</p><p>"I'll say hi to Davey for ya," Jack said, grinning at Jenny as he put some money in her palm.</p><p>"Not if I say hi to him first," Jenny replied sweetly, for the sake of being obstinate.</p><p>The bedroom door slammed shut as Jack departed, leaving Jenny alone to put her dress back on and fix her hair, which had come loose during her time with Jack. The best thing about being a whore was having her own room, and she sank wearily upon her bed and tried to ignore the sounds of the other girls that seeped through the thin walls. Before her parents turned her out on the street, she used to share a tiny room with her three sisters and cherished this time between customers, when she could be alone with her thoughts.</p><p>Except her thoughts kept turning to David again.</p><p>Most people, especially boys, would have let her steal without a care in the world, but David cared <em>and</em> he bought her breakfast, even though he probably didn't have a lot of money to spare. Plenty of people had told Jenny she was pretty, and plenty of them were willing to throw money at her, but nobody had wanted to help her before.</p><p>Bad girls like Jenny shouldn't mix with good boys like David, and yet she wanted to see him again, just to feel kindness one more time.</p><hr/><p>The moment Jack stepped out of the brothel and into the night, he heard church bells ringing in the distance, signaling the midnight hour. Well that was just perfect. It was bad enough that he couldn't resist sleeping with a whore, and now some church decided to ring its bells the second he walked out the door, letting the whole world know that a sinner just stepped outside.</p><p>Not that Jack was particularly religious or anything. Hell, he hadn't been to church since his ma was alive, back when he was a kid named Francis Sullivan, and the closest thing to religion he ever got was those nuns who took pity on the newsies and gave them breakfast. Sure, he believed in sin, and he believed in good and evil, though his beliefs came from years of working on the streets instead of sitting in church like a normal kid with a normal family.</p><p>He walked down the dark street, cigarette in hand, and thought of Jenny. Boy, she was pretty with her dark blonde hair and blue eyes, and she was good at her job to boot. It was lucky for him that David mentioned where she lived, and even luckier that headlines had been good lately and he had some spare money to spend on a little something to take the edge off his nights.</p><p>Of course, he knew he shouldn't have done it.</p><p>There was Sarah to consider, for one thing. It had been a couple of months since the strike and he liked her just as much as he ever did, but Sarah was one of those well-behaved, saving-herself-for-marriage types, and Jack didn't want to pressure her or anything, but well… he had needs. All fellows had needs; it was human nature, plain and simple, and what Sarah didn't know sure as hell wouldn't hurt her, would it?</p><p>But then of course there was David. Even an idiot could see that David liked Jenny, whether she was a whore or not. It was obvious in the way he talked about her, and Jack wasn't an expert at reading broads, but he could tell that Jenny was interested in David too, even though David would never sleep with her in a hundred years.</p><p>Still, though, Jack shouldn't have done it.</p><p>He put his half-smoked cigarette to his lips and dragged on it, and all the while he couldn't get those church bells out of his head. They echoed in his ears, ringing over and over again, and the further he walked down the street the harder he thought about that echoing sound.</p><p>There were few things Jack regretted in his life. Sure, he cheated and stole now and then, but then he invented some clever lie to cover it up and moved on. He supposed if his ma could see him now, she'd be mighty disappointed. If David and Sarah could see him, they'd be <em>really</em> disappointed, and Jack could lie all he wanted, but it wouldn't change the fact that he sought Jenny out and willingly slept with her.</p><p>And yet he would probably do it again if he had the chance. He could still see her hair coming loose from its pins, feel her soft skin on his hands, hear her lips shape the sound of his name… and hell, even now he still wanted her. Even now, when those church bells rang in his head like a never-ending vaudeville tune, he wanted her badly.</p><p>He was a seventeen-year-old boy without a family. Who could blame him?</p><p>Jack kept walking, and he kept on smoking, and somewhere along the way he wondered about those church bells. He remembered his parents had been Catholic, just like any Irish in New York, and he knew he went to church until his ma kicked the bucket, and he hadn't attended a service ever since. Maybe he would have stayed out of trouble if he had, but probably not. The closest thing to church Jack had ever gotten in recent years was the time some Catholic priest dropped by the lodging house to hear confession from all the Irish and Italian boys, and whoever else he considered worthy. Jack remembered kneeling in front of the guy, stubbornly proud in his worn-out clothes and scuffed boots, and he repeated what the priest instructed him to say.</p><p>"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned."</p><p>The words popped out of Jack's mouth as he walked the dark, silent streets of Manhattan, and he brought himself back to that day two years ago, when he knelt in front of a stranger and confessed his wrongdoings. All of his lies, his thievery, his reckless behavior; the list went on.</p><p>"I slept with a whore tonight," Jack murmured out loud, as if that priest from long ago was walking right beside him. "And yeah, it ain't the first time I've gotten into a girl's skirt, but this time it's different."</p><p>He wasn't thinking straight when he entered that brothel. He should have been in his bunk at the lodging house, dreaming his usual dreams about desert sand and horses out west, saving his earnings for something more useful than a temporary good time.</p><p>"Ya see, I got a girl now. And she's good. She's real good, much better than the likes of me, and I ain't doin' a very good job of makin' her ma and pop approve of me, that's for sure."</p><p>He remembered how Jenny removed the red bandana from his neck, and the feel of her fingertips on his skin chased away every doubt in his mind. The moment her lips settled against his, more addictive than a cigarette and twice as dangerous, he knew there was no going back until he had gone all the way.</p><p>"And I got this friend. He's real good too, and real smart on top of that. I guess he thinks he can be a gentleman to this girl, 'cause he likes her and all, and I don't even have the decency to keep my pants off when I'm around her. Some friend I am, huh?"</p><p>Oh, he still wanted her, all right. He longed to go back to that brothel and spend every lousy cent he had, just to spend another night in her company and hike up that pretty green skirt again. He threw his cigarette on the darkened ground and crushed it under his boot heel, hard enough to flatten the cylinder until it was thin as newsprint.</p><p>"Ya know, every now and then I get to thinkin' I'm gonna change, and be more like Davey, for instance. But I know that ain't possible, 'cause every time I start turnin' good, I go right back to bein' bad."</p><p>He supposed it was in his blood, passed down from his convict father, who was guilty of his own share of lying, thieving, and whoring. He could help the newsies of New York win a strike against Pulitzer, and he was still going to keep on lying about his name. He could win the heart of a nice girl like Sarah Jacobs, and he was still going to feel desire pulse in his veins at the sight of a girl like Jenny. He could confess his sins right there in the street for anybody to hear, and he was still going to keep on sinning, over and over again.</p><p>Those church bells sounded in his head, a distant <em>ding, ding, ding</em>, and he wanted to feel guilty but he knew he was too far gone for that.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Temptation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>David felt like a changed person when he woke up in the morning.</p><p>The boy who went to bed last night was not the same boy who had woken up the previous morning, and the boy who woke up now felt as if he had found a new side of the world that had been hiding in the shadows. He had known all along that prostitutes existed, that there were girls out there who relied on such a profession to stay alive, but he never expected that darker world to collide with his own. The girls and women who inhabited the brothels had always seemed like such distant creatures, so far removed from David that they might as well have not existed, but then Jenny came along, and she wasn't just some nameless, faceless whore from a faraway world.</p><p>Jenny was a <em>person</em>. A fellow human being, just like David, and he couldn't get her out of his mind as he washed up and sat down at the breakfast table between Les and Sarah.</p><p>What would his family think if they knew he had breakfast with a prostitute the day before? His father would shake his head in disappointment, which always hurt worse than the angriest words, and his mother would probably drag him down to the nearest synagogue in hopes of cleansing his soul. As for his siblings... David had always striven to be a good role model for Les, and the thought of Sarah only reminded him that Jenny might have a family out there somewhere, and she might even be somebody's sister. If Sarah ever ended up in Jenny's situation, David would do everything he could to get her out.</p><p>There they all sat, the five members of the Jacobs family, and David remained silent as he watched everyone at the breakfast table, happy and normal in spite of financial difficulties. He had so much while Jenny had so little, and he knew he couldn't help all the whores of New York, but if he could help organize a strike then surely he could find a way to help just one girl who needed a friend.</p><p>David was about to excuse himself from the table when Les tugged at his shirt sleeve. "David, can I sell with you today?"</p><p>The David who had woken the morning before would have readily said yes, but that was the David who hadn't met Jenny. The David who woke up this morning, the David who knew Jenny, had no place for tag-along little brothers when his mind was filled with feminine blue eyes and green skirts.</p><p>"I'm sorry, Les," said David. "Why don't you help Mama around the house instead?"</p><p>Les immediately pouted. "But it's been <em>days</em> since I last sold with you!"</p><p>"Les, your brother is out to earn money for the family," their mother chided. "He doesn't need you underfoot."</p><p>David was grateful for a legitimate excuse to leave Les behind, though he felt somewhat guilty as he pulled his cap on and kissed his mother goodbye before going out the door. The need to see Jenny again had grown strong enough to frighten him, and yet he <em>had</em> to see her or else he would never be able to rest. He tried to rationalize these feelings as he walked to the distribution center, telling himself that this longing came from an overwhelming sense of moral duty and desire to do the right thing. Jenny almost stole some food, after all, and who was to say she wouldn't steal again unless he intervened?</p><p>A line had already formed at the distribution center by the time David arrived and he stood behind Race, who clutched his usual cigar between his fingers and eagerly told Mush about yesterday's horse races. Jack stood just in front of Mush, absently playing with his bandana as he waited for Weisel to open up, and the moment Race noticed David he nudged Jack in the ribs, breaking off his story.</p><p>"Say, look who's arrived," said Race. "It's Mr. Innocent himself. Did I ever tell the rest of you fellas what me and Jack found Davey with yesterday?"</p><p>"Aw, come on," said Jack. "Don't tell that story."</p><p>"Why not? It's a real laugh, and Dave won't mind, will ya, Dave?"</p><p>David felt several pairs of eyes on him and if he was the type of person who believed in luck, he would have thought that terrible luck had placed him behind Race that morning. "I don't think that's a story anyone else needs to hear," he said.</p><p>"Ya see, Race?" said Jack. "Just drop it."</p><p>"Must be some story if you fellas are keepin' it all hushed up like that," Crutchy broke in, turning eager eyes upon Jack and David. "Come on, spill it!"</p><p>"Bet it's good if Davey's involved," said Blink. "Davey don't do nothin' wrong."</p><p>"Oh, it's real good," said Race. "Better'n Christmas. But as ya can see, Dave don't want me tellin' you nothin', so I'll make you boys a deal. If any of you can guess what the story's about, <em>then</em> I'll tell ya, but it's gonna cost you a penny a guess."</p><p>Trust Race to make a profit off of David's personal business. David thrust his hands into his pockets and willed himself to have patience, since most of the other newsies had probably done things that were far worse, and as he looked past Race's head his eyes met Jack's. Jack stared at him for a moment, as if David had left a spot of breakfast on his face, and then broke eye contact so he could fish a cigarette out of his pocket.</p><p>David didn't think Jack's behavior was strange, exactly, and yet something in Jack's face was different, though he couldn't describe what it was. He didn't have time to contemplate it, since Weisel and the Delancey brothers began handing out papers, and as the line moved forward he even forgot about Race and his deal concerning yesterday's events.</p><p>"Fifty papes," David told Weisel, handing over his money to pay for them.</p><p>"You be careful sellin' today, Dave," Race murmured right behind him, giving David a conspiratorial wink. "Don't wanna run into any girls with loose morals, right?"</p><p>David ignored him and walked off with his stack of papers, knowing that anything coming Race's mouth was meant in good fun, or at least most of the time. He noticed Jack watching him from a distance and wanted to call out to him, but soon Jack turned his back on him and began walking down the street, already twisting the bland headline into something more sensational.</p><p>David followed suit, though his heart definitely wasn't in the selling that morning. Every time he passed a shop or a market, he half-expected to find Jenny stealing again, but she was nowhere in sight and he was forced to move on, though his feet carried him ever closer to the address Jenny had given him. A couple of months ago David would have never been able to find the location on his own, and even if he <em>could</em> find it he wasn't sure if he would have been bold enough to pursue it. Selling papers for weeks on end taught him two valuable things: how to navigate all of Manhattan, and the importance of going after something he felt was right.</p><p>The strike against Pulitzer had changed him. He knew he had a voice, he knew he could make a <em>difference</em>, and what better way to make a difference than to venture beyond his corner of society to offer a helping hand? He supposed it was what his mother would have wanted him to do—in a way, at least—though he didn't think her idea of helping neighbors extended to girls who sold themselves.</p><p><em>Prostitutes</em>. David suddenly remembered that Jenny belonged to that class, that she wasn't just some impoverished girl who needed charity so she wouldn't steal. She knew men, and lots of them, and the old David might have turned around to return to his usual selling spots, but he wasn't the old David anymore, and he kept on walking closer and closer to that address she had given him. Deep down, beneath all the determination and the willingness to do good, he knew that a part of him hoped that Jack and Race had been wrong, and that Jenny didn't belong to that fallen class who earned their money in the late night hours.</p><p>Part of him hoped, and yet part of him knew such hopes were foolish.</p><p>The house Jenny resided in was a nondescript brownstone building, a bit shabby in places but respectable enough, at least on the outside. David stood out on the doorstep for what felt like forever, but then he remembered what it felt like to enter Pulitzer's office and demand justice, and he pressed the doorbell with a firm hand.</p><p>A middle-aged woman with piles of brown hair pinned up on her head answered the door. She wore significant amounts of jewelry, despite the morning hour, and regarded David with a pair of shrewd green eyes that looked him up and down, taking in every detail of his person. "Can I help you?" She enunciated her speech carefully, no doubt to hide the trace of street accent that threatened to creep in. David had heard a couple of his fellow newsies speak in exactly the same way when they wanted to impress wealthy paper buyers.</p><p>David pretended she was just another Pulitzer, and this was just another battle to be conquered for the good of New York. "I'm here to see Jenny. Is she in?"</p><p>The woman's eyes fastened upon the papers in David's hand. "Why? Has she subscribed to a paperboy without telling me?"</p><p>"Um, no. I just want to see her and say hello, that's all."</p><p>Her lips curved upward into an expression that was more of a smirk than a smile, and it made David nervous. "Ah, I see. It's a bit early, but I believe she's in. Why don't you go on up and see?"</p><p>She let David into the main parlor, a dark room that smelled faintly smoky and somewhat sweet, like a combination between Race's cigars and the rooftop garden Sarah tended. A plush sofa, pale blue in color, sat between two identical pink chairs, and an elegant painting of a bouquet hung above the furniture. David was used to wooden floors at home, but the floor of this parlor was covered in thick carpet that felt like paradise after walking the hard streets, and there wasn't a single person in sight. David didn't know what to expect from a brothel, having never seen one before, and he had been afraid to find a hellish atmosphere filled to the corners with depravity, but the house was almost eerily quiet.</p><p>Of course, it was also morning time, and he supposed it became more brothel-like as the day turned into night, which was a thought he immediately pushed out of his mind. It was bad enough that he had the boldness to enter such a building; he didn't need to contemplate the inner workings of the place as well.</p><p>The woman, who David assumed was the landlady, showed him to a staircase, also richly carpeted, and gave him an indulgent smile that made David feel more uncomfortable than before. The house looked like a normal home, but it didn't quite <em>feel</em> like a normal home, and in spite of the comfortable furnishings he wasn't quite at ease. David had entered forbidden territory, going against all of the moral teachings his parents had raised him on, and there was no going back.</p><p>He ascended the staircase, one lavish step at a time, and reminded himself that he wasn't here to spend time in a house of ill repute. He was here to see <em>Jenny</em>.</p><p>He found her door, adorned with a brass number 4, and knew perfectly well that he didn't belong in this house, but he brought his fist against the wood all the same. The knock sounded as loud as gunfire in his own ears and embarrassment shot through him, causing him to stand rooted to the spot when the door opened a moment later and Jenny appeared, her blonde hair loose around her shoulders.</p><p>Her blue eyes widened with delight. "David! I've been waitin' for you to come and see me."</p><p>"Is that middle-aged woman with the jewelry your landlady?" David asked. "The one who wouldn't feed you?"</p><p>"That's Mrs. Johnson, and she ain't <em>really</em> a landlady, ya know. I only told you that 'cause I didn't trust you at first."</p><p>"What makes you trust me now?"</p><p>Jenny just smiled at David and pulled him inside the room, shutting the door behind her. Her room was small and sparsely furnished, with a plain bed and dresser, and the curtains were tightly drawn over the single window. "So what brings ya here so early in the day?" Jenny asked, releasing David's hand. "Come here to sell me a paper?"</p><p>David wished he could hide his stack of papers behind his back. "No."</p><p>"Didn't think so," said Jenny. "Your dear mama don't know where you're at, does she? I imagine she'd be scandalized that you're seein' the likes of me."</p><p>"Nobody knows I'm here. And even if they did, it wouldn't stop me."</p><p>Jenny studied him with interest, her eyes growing more serious as she looked into his face. "Why?" she asked. "You know what I am, don'tcha? Most people like you would look at me all pityingly and pray for my sins, not buy me breakfast."</p><p>"I bought you breakfast because I wanted to help you," said David. "I <em>still</em> want to help you."</p><p>She shook her head sadly. "There ain't any helpin' me, David. I've already done too many things I can't undo."</p><p>She looked prettier than yesterday, with her hair unpinned and her face free of cosmetics, and David thought it was such a pity that a girl like her wasn't going to school, eating meals with a proper family, and seeing boys without being obligated to sleep with them. He knew he shouldn't be in this house, and he shouldn't be talking to this girl, and yet when she looked into his eyes he knew he couldn't leave.</p><p>"You don't have to do this, you know," David blurted out.</p><p>Her smile was bitter. "Oh yeah? And how am I s'posed to eat?"</p><p>David knew his words would sound ridiculous before they even left his mouth. "I don't know. There aren't a whole lot of them, but some girls <em>do</em> go out and become newsies."</p><p>"And where would I live? I imagine these girl newsies don't have a lodgin' house if there ain't a lot of 'em."</p><p>"I guess you don't have a family, do you?"</p><p>"Oh, I got a family," said Jenny. "But they don't want me, and I don't want them. Now if you're gonna just stand here in my room and lecture me, ya might as well leave, 'cause what I do ain't good and it ain't bad either, David. It's what I do."</p><p><em>It's what I do</em>. David reflected upon her words, once more aware of how she reminded him of Jack with her matter-of-fact, unapologetic outlook on life. "I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have come to bother you."</p><p>"Who says you're botherin' me?" Jenny's eyes grew warmer as she looked him over. "Maybe I <em>like</em> havin' you here. Let's you and me sit over on the bed and talk a while."</p><p>"I don't think that would be appropriate, Jenny."</p><p>"What's wrong with sittin'? You've sat and talked with girls before, haven't ya?"</p><p>"Not many," David admitted.</p><p>"Have ya ever kissed a girl before?"</p><p>Jenny's question caught David by surprise, and he found himself flushing before he could stop himself. "Does it matter if I have or not?"</p><p>Somehow Jenny had ended up closer to him and she took him by his free hand, wrapping her smooth fingers around his own. "Well don'tcha think you should practice? I promise I won't tell nobody."</p><p>David looked at her small hand holding him in its grasp, at her unpinned hair framing her face, at her red dress with its narrow waist and tempting neckline, and he <em>wanted</em> to kiss her. He wanted to satisfy his curiosity and find out what her lips tasted like, for girls still remained a far-off mystery to him, almost foreign aside from his sister Sarah. The other newsies all cracked jokes about girls and bragged about their conquests, and occasionally they invited David to join in, but he had never found that right girl who piqued his interest enough to pursue her.</p><p>He still hadn't found her, for Jenny wasn't the right girl at all. Jenny was entirely the<em> wrong</em> girl, but she was the only girl who made David feel like stepping outside of his boundaries and doing something completely reckless.</p><p>And yet he couldn't bring himself to kiss her. "I've got papers to sell," he said, pulling his hand from Jenny's grasp. "I've got to get back to work."</p><p>She didn't try and stop him, but stood there and watched him with a tiny smile on her lips. "You'll be back," she said as he headed out the door.</p><p>David hurried down the stairs of the brothel, refusing to slow down long enough to wonder if she was right.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Denial</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>David put all of his energy into selling papers and tried to forget how he felt when Jenny offered to kiss him. Part of him still longed for her and wanted to run back to her room to change his mind, while part of him was afraid of her and never wanted to see her face again. By the time afternoon arrived he had sold most of his papers and headed into Lou's, the popular diner of the month. It was hard to believe that yesterday morning, a little more than twenty-four hours ago, he had sat in this very restaurant and bought breakfast for Jenny, without knowing what she was.</p><p>It still bothered him, knowing what she did for a living, and he wished he could find some way to change her circumstances, and yet it still didn't stop him from seeing her and thinking about her. That was what perplexed David the most; the fact that he knew better than to get mixed up in people of her class, but he couldn't stay away no matter how wrong it was. It weighed on David's conscience, making him dread going home and facing his mother, and yet he knew he would repeat his actions all over again if he had the chance.</p><p>Jenny wasn't a person he could easily forget.</p><p>David pushed open the door of Lou's, his few remaining papers clutched in one hand, and noticed a handful of his fellow newsies seated at the same table. "Why, Dave, you're alone," said Race, the first one to notice him. "Almost expected to see a skirt on your arm."</p><p>David immediately knew it was a mistake to enter the restaurant, but it was too late to turn back. Several pairs of curious eyes fell upon him and David put on a brave face as he took a seat at the table, determined not to let Race have the upper hand.</p><p>"So is it true, Davey?" asked Mush. "Did ya really have breakfast with a hooker?"</p><p>David felt a twinge of annoyance at Jack and Race, even though he noticed that Jack was absent from the restaurant. "Can't keep a good story to yourself, can you?" he asked Race.</p><p>"Aw, I know what you're thinkin', Dave," said Race, leaning casually in his seat. "But I didn't let the cat outta the bag. Specs here guessed that you was with a girl, and Blink guessed that she was a hooker, ya see? I couldn't lie to these fellas, now could I?"</p><p>"I still ain't buyin' it," said Skittery. "Dave wasn't with no whore unless he says so himself."</p><p>"Whaddya mean, ya ain't buyin' it?" said Race. "I saw it with my own eyes. Tell 'em, Dave."</p><p>David couldn't possibly stay silent when everyone at the table expected him to speak. "It's true," he admitted. He wondered why Jack, the other witness to the event, hadn't joined the others.</p><p>"Told ya!" Race said to Skittery, giving him a playful punch on the shoulder. "Shouldn'ta made that bet with me, eh? Now ya gotta pay for my roast beef here."</p><p>"But that's fifteen cents," Skittery groaned. "You picked somethin' expensive on purpose."</p><p>"Ain't my fault you was dumb enough to bet with me."</p><p>David ordered lunch for himself and was forced to answer all of the questions the other newsies asked him about Jenny. He couldn't lie, so he gave them the true story, but he provided as few details as possible and didn't tell anyone he had visited Jenny that morning. It was none of their business, first of all, and he didn't like the thought of so many people knowing about Jenny, even if Jack and Race had been the only ones to see her. He wanted to keep her to himself.</p><p>He sure wished Jack was around, though. Jack might have found a way to change the subject, or at least take some of the pressure off of David.</p><p>"So she's a nice girl, is she?" Blink was saying, interest shining in his one visible eye. "A real looker?"</p><p>"Aw, you're pathetic," said Specs. "Chasin' after a skirt you ain't even met."</p><p>"Besides, she's Dave's girl," Crutchy broke in. "Ain't she, Dave?"</p><p>David opened his mouth to reply, but Skittery spoke first. "Stupid," he told Crutchy. "She's a <em>whore</em>. She ain't nobody's girl."</p><p>"You mean she's <em>everybody's</em> girl," said Race, chuckling.</p><p>David grew more uncomfortable by the second and forced himself to keep eating so he would get his money's worth. When he finished his meal, he left the restaurant as politely as possible and ignored the catcalls directed at him as he went out the door. One thing was certain: he would have to find a new place to eat if he wanted to avoid unpleasant questions, and he hoped nobody spilled anything to Sarah or Les if they ever came into contact with them. If his family <em>had</em> to find out what had happened in the last couple of days, they should hear it from David himself.</p><p>He sold off the last of his papers and headed for home when he came across Jack on a street corner by the bookseller's. Jack kept silent and didn't call out any of his usual greetings, and David wondered if he was getting sick. The weather grew cooler every day, bordering on cold at times, and newsies were especially susceptible when they were outside all day.</p><p>David put a smile on his face and approached Jack. "I haven't seen you all day."</p><p>"Yeah, well, I been busy," said Jack.</p><p>"Several of the guys gathered at Lou's for lunch. I was surprised you weren't there."</p><p>"Why's that?"</p><p>David hesitated, remembering all of the jokes and jabbing he had to endure. "Well, word got around about what happened yesterday morning, when you and Race saw me. They all seem to think it's funny."</p><p>"I ain't laughin', am I?" said Jack. He regarded David casually, as if their conversation only half-interested him. "Say, what was the name of that girl anyway? You ever see her again after that?"</p><p>David couldn't lie, not even to the biggest liar he knew. "Her name's Jenny. And yeah, I went and saw her this morning."</p><p>Jack looked more interested and smirked at David. "Oh yeah? Couldn't resist, could ya?"</p><p>"It wasn't like that," David said firmly. "I just wanted to talk to her again. And I don't think it matters what I do with my time, so I hope you don't go spreading this around."</p><p>"I won't tell nobody, and I really mean it. Just answer me this one question, Davey: ya really didn't sleep with her? I imagine she took ya to her room for your little chat, didn't she?"</p><p>"I didn't sleep with her," said David. "And I don't intend to."</p><p>"You ain't tempted at all? Not even by a pretty thing like that?"</p><p>David didn't answer the question and told Jack he had to get home, then walked past him at a pace that took him away as quickly as possible without being obvious about it. Of <em>course</em> he didn't want to sleep with Jenny, and it was rude of Jack to ask him such a thing, especially after David made it clear that nothing of the sort had happened. People like Jack might not have any problem with getting into a girl's bed and handing her money afterwards, but David was better than that. He had been brought up properly, he had been taught to respect all women, and he had been instructed to abstain from engaging in <em>that</em> until he was married.</p><p>So why did he keep regretting the fact that he didn't kiss Jenny?</p><hr/><p>Jack was restless at ten o'clock at night. So restless, in fact, that he couldn't stay in the lodging house and roamed the streets until he was standing in front of the building he had entered the night before. The building that had been calling to him ever since the sun went down hours ago, the building that Jenny was currently inside of, hopefully alone in her room. Jack wasn't supposed to be anywhere near this building, but he didn't approach the doors with the same purpose as last night.</p><p>He just wanted to talk to her this time, and if things <em>did</em> get amorous and she was willing to give him a discount, well, Jack was never one to turn down a bargain.</p><p>Number 6, Mrs. Johnson's place, wasn't one of those high-end brothels that catered to rich fellows like Pulitzer, but it wasn't one of those seedy, nickel-a-night places either. It was somewhere in-between, though it was fortunately on the cheaper side, and as Jack entered the smoky parlor he had to remind himself that this was a social call, first and foremost. A few girls were lounging on the chairs and sofa, surrounded by fellows with alcohol and cigarettes in their hands, and Jack searched for Jenny's familiar blonde head. A hand slipped around his waist, fingertips pressing lightly against him, and a pink mouth drew up close to his ear.</p><p>"Ya look lonely," a girl's voice whispered. "What's your name?"</p><p>Jack turned his head to face a girl with dark curls and heavily made-up eyes that stared into his own. "Jack Kelly," he replied, giving her his most charming smirk. "What's yours?"</p><p>"It's Kitty," she said, tightening her grip on him just a little. "You wanna go upstairs?"</p><p>Boy, he sure did. Kitty smelled like soap and perfume, and she was quite a bit shorter than Jack, giving him a perfect view down her fancy dress. These dames who worked in brothels didn't get out a whole lot, being tied to their bedrooms and all, which made it easy for Jack because all he had to do was spin a couple of stories about Santa Fe and he had them eating out of the palm of his hand. How were girls like them supposed to know he'd never been to Santa Fe? Most of them had probably never even heard of the place and thought it was some exotic foreign country or something.</p><p>Kitty was gorgeous and she was probably great at what she did, if Jenny was anything to go by, but the color of her eyes reminded him of Sarah and the desire that burned inside him started to die down. It was bad enough that he had already slept with one whore, and he couldn't imagine how Sarah would feel if she knew he slept with two different whores, two nights in a row. He'd be in a lot of trouble, that was for sure. Not that he intended on letting Sarah find out, but even a guy like Jack was capable of feeling guilty now and then.</p><p>"Say, you're a beautiful dame and all," said Jack, keeping his eyes focused on Kitty's face so he wouldn't be tempted to look elsewhere. "But I ain't here for fun and games. I'm here for business."</p><p>Kitty smiled at him. "Business? If that's what ya wanna call it, then fine with me."</p><p>"Look here, doll, I mean it. Is Jenny around? I gotta talk to her for a minute."</p><p>Kitty's eyes narrowed, reminding Jack of those stray dogs that hung around alleys and got all possessive over the bones they stole from the butcher shop. "If ya wanted Jenny, you coulda just said so at the beginning. She's free for now."</p><p>"Aw, come on," said Jack. "It ain't like that, I said. You're a helluva lot prettier than Jenny, for one thing, and I bet you're a better kisser too. Why don'tcha show me before I head upstairs?"</p><p>"It's gonna cost ya," said Kitty, and she glowered at him before sauntering away to greet the pair of young men who had just entered the room.</p><p>Typical whore. You couldn't so much as look at the broads without getting charged for it, and the moment you showed interest in something else they got all offended. Jack wasn't the type of fellow who frequented whorehouses on a regular basis—he couldn't afford to, first of all—but he had seen enough hookers to know how they operated, and some of them could be as shrewd as Racetrack at a poker game. Jack decided he would worry about Kitty later, if he ever ran into her again, and headed upstairs to Jenny's room.</p><p>All it took was two brief knocks on the door and she answered, looking all dolled up in a red dress. Jack supposed it was hard to take your time answering the door when your room was so small, and even harder when there was hardly any space between the bed and the door.</p><p>"Well if it ain't Jack Kelly," said Jenny, smiling sweetly up at him. "Back so soon? I'm flattered."</p><p>"Yeah, well don't flatter yourself too much," said Jack. "Mind lettin' me in? I gotta talk to you."</p><p>"I don't get many requests to just talk. Whaddya wanna talk about?"</p><p>"Lemme in and I'll tell ya."</p><p>Jenny obeyed and stepped back so he could enter the cramped room. Jack kind of wished she had a chair he could sit on instead of just the bed, but he supposed that was the point since all her visitors came to use the bed anyway. He stood near the door, gazing into Jenny's curious face, and almost forgot what he wanted to say when he looked into her eyes. "What are ya doin' with a fella like Davey?" he asked.</p><p>Jenny's curious gaze turned into a frown. "Whaddya mean?"</p><p>"I heard he went and saw ya today. I ain't usually the kinda guy who meddles in other people's business, but I known Davey for a little while and I know he ain't the sorta fella who walks into a place like this. He's got a family and morals and all."</p><p>"I know that."</p><p>"Well I don't think Davey really understands the situation. He's been kinda sheltered, ya know what I mean? He prob'ly thinks you're some innocent waif who needs charity or somethin'."</p><p>Jenny just smiled, but Jack figured it was more of a smirk.</p><p>"What I'm gettin' at here is that you ain't allowed to hurt Davey," said Jack. "He's too good for that."</p><p>"That's real nice of you to care about David," she said. "Real sweet and all, but that ain't why you're really here, is it?"</p><p>"What, are you a mind reader too?"</p><p>"You don't gotta be a mind reader to understand fellas like you, Jack. Don't take a genius to figure out ya came 'cause ya wanted to see me again."</p><p>Jenny hit the nail right on the head. No wonder David liked her.</p><p>"And what makes ya think that, sweetheart?" said Jack, deciding to play with her a bit.</p><p>"You wouldn't come all this way just to talk about David at <em>this</em> hour," Jenny replied. "In fact, I doubt you'd come all this way just to talk about David at any hour. And besides, I seen the way you been lookin' at me."</p><p>She was pretty smart for a hooker, and Jack had met some dumb hookers in his lifetime. Didn't stop him from rolling in the sack with them, though. "Yeah?" he said. "And how have I been lookin' at ya?"</p><p>"Like ya wanna do <em>this</em>." Jenny closed the distance between them and kissed Jack, slipping an arm around his body to draw him in closer. The girl was smart and she had skills, which was partially what made Jack so tempted by her in the first place, and the feel of her lips was enough to make him forget about Sarah, at least for a little while.</p><p>"You just want my hard-earned money, don'tcha?" Jack murmured in her ear as he carried her to the bed.</p><p>"We all want somethin', don't we?" she replied.</p><p>He knew that was true, and he didn't care either. There was something about being with Jenny that made him feel a bit easier with himself, probably because she was just as much of a sinner as he was, and all the things he had done just didn't seem so bad anymore when she was with him, looking so pretty as she gave him his money's worth.</p><p>He loved the particular dark shade of her blonde hair. Some of those fancy society ladies looked like ghosts with their pale hair and pale skin and pale dresses, but Jenny wasn't anything like them. She looked full of life, with her rich hair and glowing skin, especially now when Jack was taking her. David was a fool for not wanting to sleep with a girl like this, even if her time didn't come for free, and Jack supposed he kept coming back to whores in the end because they were made for this.</p><p>He couldn't imagine a girl like Sarah doing what Jenny was doing right now, that was for sure. But of course he still loved Sarah; she was a good girl, and good girls helped him feel halfway respectable after he got all the sinning out of his system. He would drop in for dinner with her folks sometime soon, maybe tomorrow night after he sold the evening edition, and would make it up to her that way. And if David was there, well... Jack didn't mind facing David. It wasn't like Jenny was David's girl or anything, so there was no reason for him to feel bad towards David for what he had done.</p><p>If David didn't want Jenny, then Jack was more than happy to take her.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Desire</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jenny woke up with last night's makeup smudged and her hair in tangles. She was kept awake by johns until midnight and wanted nothing more than a bath and a hot cup of tea. Yawning, she rolled out of bed and pulled off her rumpled dress so that she was left in her drawers, and that was when she saw it: a red bandana lying on the floor, intertwined among the stockings and ribbons she had discarded before going to sleep.</p><p>The last thing she needed was a reminder of Jack Kelly, but there it was. She only slept with him for the money, though she had to admit there was something appealing about newsies in general, in spite of their boyish, unrefined ways. Besides, Jack understood her in a way that most of the other johns didn't, and seeing him reminded her of David. Which was both a blessing and a curse.</p><p>Jenny pulled a brush through her hair a few times, then gathered up a change of clothes and headed to the washroom. It really was quite sweet of David to come see her yesterday morning, and it was endearing how he thought she could just give up the life as if it didn't have a hold on her. David was sheltered, just like Jack said, and yet that was one of the most appealing things about him. It was nice knowing that someone was concerned about her, even if the two of them barely knew each other.</p><p>She heard Mrs. Johnson bustling around, scolding the maid, and walked a bit faster to the washroom. Mrs. Johnson wasn't her real name, of course, and she sure as hell wasn't married; it just made her sound more respectable when she encountered people who weren't customers. She wasn't a bad sort of madam, when she wasn't punishing Jenny for falling asleep, and she was really the closest thing to a mother she had.</p><p>The washroom was empty when Jenny arrived and she figured most of the house was still slumbering. Jenny usually woke up early, whether she meant to or not, and it was easier to get out of bed because she always had a hard time falling back asleep, but most of the other girls slept in late. Of course, some of the girls drank themselves silly, a habit that Jenny did not partake in.</p><p>At least most of the time.</p><p>The bath felt heavenly and Jenny sank herself as deeply into the water as the small tub would allow, letting it soothe her tired joints and relax her mind. She would have to return that bandana to Jack, preferably before he started to sell his papers, and she remembered him telling her about the distribution center last night, when he had finished screwing her and lounged on the bed smoking a cigarette. She would make her bath a quick one and hurry down to the distribution center, and if she couldn't find Jack then she would keep the bandana and wait for him to return to the brothel.</p><p>He would certainly be back; if not that evening, then perhaps the next evening, or the one after that. She knew that as surely as she knew her name.</p><p>"Well fancy seein' <em>you</em> here." Kitty, who slept just two doors away from Jenny, sauntered into the washroom. Her dark curls, which were normally pulled back with a ribbon, spilled over her shoulders and her petite lips curved into a smile. "Always up early, ain'tcha?"</p><p>"Can't sleep," Jenny replied from her spot in the tub.</p><p>"I can imagine why," said Kitty. "Bet that cowboy who came to see ya kept you up all night, eh?"</p><p>"What cowboy?"</p><p>"Oh, the young, good-lookin' one with the red bandana. Said he just wanted to chat with ya, but we both know better."</p><p>Jenny chose her words with care. Kitty was notoriously vain and fancied herself the best girl in the house, which meant she hated it when anyone else was successful. "Oh, <em>that</em> cowboy. Bored me somethin' stupid after he stuck it in me. He ain't even a real cowboy; the fool just thinks he's one."</p><p>"Well he was <em>awful</em> dandy lookin' for a bore," Kitty said as she began to undress for her own bath. "And he requested ya special. You musta had him before."</p><p>"Once," Jenny replied truthfully. "Hardly worth the dough, to tell ya the truth."</p><p>Kitty appeared satisfied with this response and didn't mention Jack again, much to Jenny's relief. "Ya know, Charlene's been cryin' again," she remarked with a wicked sort of enthusiasm. "I heard her when I passed her room just now. The girl's been here a month already. Mrs. Johnson'll throw her out if she don't toughen up soon."</p><p>Jenny suspected that Kitty <em>hoped</em> Charlene would get thrown out, but she didn't say so. "Well ya gotta admit, some of those fellas get some strange notions in their heads. I s'pose it might frighten a girl like Charlene."</p><p>"Well then she clearly ain't fit for the life. She's better off wastin' away in a factory, growin' pale and faded and wearin' her hands to the bone. Some girls just ain't made for this."</p><p>Jenny let Kitty talk on, acknowledging her here and there to be polite. Out of all the girls in Mrs. Johnson's house, Kitty was the one who pulled off the fancy rich girl look the best, with her petite, refined looking features and her regal posture. Rumor said that her mother was also a whore and her father was some wealthy married man who lived in a mansion, though nobody knew how true that was. Nobody knew much about anybody in the brothel, not even each other's last names.</p><p>Even Mrs. Johnson didn't know that Jenny's full name was Jane Doyle, and that she had grown up in the Bowery with her parents and five siblings. In the brothel the present meant more than the past or the future, and most of the girls lived their lives one day at a time, knowing that each day would be the same as the last one. Jack understood, since the life of a newsie wasn't so wildly different, aside from the nighttime activities, of course. David was the optimistic one, the one with hopes and goals, but then again, David was the one who had a shot at having a future.</p><p>Jenny hated knowing that she longed to see David again and blamed this longing on a harmless curiosity. The two of them <em>did</em> have the most interesting conversations when they saw one another.</p><p>She dried herself off, got dressed, and left the washroom as quickly as possible, bidding an overly polite farewell to Kitty, then got a quick bite to eat from the kitchen. Mrs. Johnson didn't mind her eating this time, since she had entertained a proper number of johns last night, and once she had eaten she set out for the distribution center. Jenny didn't get out a whole lot, but she kept her eyes open whenever she did, and she could have sworn she had passed the distribution center on her occasional walks to the dressmaker's shop and the dry goods store. Jack's red bandana dangled from her hand as she walked, urging her not to turn back each time doubt crept into her mind.</p><p>An unmistakable crowd of boys up ahead told her that she had gone in the right direction, and she hurried towards the newsies purchasing their papers, noticing that they all looked similar in their faded caps, boots, and suspenders. Suddenly self-conscious, Jenny stuffed the bandana into her skirt and approached the line, searching for Jack's familiar face.</p><p>"Say, fellas!" a voice said from a few feet away. "Would ya lookie there? It's Dave's hooker."</p><p>Jenny felt countless eyes upon her and recognized the short, dark-haired boy who had accompanied Jack that first morning, when she walked out of the restaurant with David. She tried to ignore the newsies and continued walking down the street, as if she was all alone on a stroll in the park, though she glanced out of the corner of her eye in search of Jack.</p><p>"Hey, Davey!" the dark-haired boy called out, making Jenny freeze in her tracks. "Your girl's here!"</p><p>David stepped out from the front of the line, looking puzzled as he clutched a recently bought stack of newspapers, but when his eyes found Jenny they lit up with recognition and he hurried towards her. "Jenny! What are you doing here?"</p><p>"Is it suddenly a crime takin' a walk through Manhattan?" she asked, smiling at him. "I thought I'd catch ya at work."</p><p>David looked embarrassed and he glanced at the other boys who watched with avid interest. "There isn't much to see," he said. "Unless you want to buy a paper."</p><p>"Sell 'er one, Davey!" one of the newsies called out.</p><p>"I'd love to buy a paper," said Jenny. "You don't get a lotta news where I'm from."</p><p>David hesitated, appearing to be at war with himself, but at last he took Jenny by the arm and walked past the line of newsies, past the man who handed out papers to the boys. At last Jenny's eyes fell upon Jack, who stood with a stack of papers in his hands, reading through the headlines, and he looked directly at her for just a moment before he looked away, re-absorbing himself in his papers as if he didn't know her. His behavior didn't surprise Jenny, though she was starkly aware of the bandana hidden in her skirt, providing bright red evidence of what she had done with Jack. It was a silly idea to seek him out and try to return his bandana, and now she was trapped as David led her away from the distribution center, away from Jack and his shameful avoidance of her eyes.</p><p>"Why did you come here?" David asked when the two of them were out of earshot. He released her arm.</p><p>Jenny certainly couldn't tell him about Jack, even if it was the truth. "I thought about what ya said yesterday," she replied.</p><p>"About how you don't have to do what you do for a living?"</p><p>"No, of course not. The work ain't no walk in the park most of the time, but it puts bread in my mouth."</p><p>"That sounds like something my friend Jack would say," said David, and Jenny felt a twinge of guilt that she didn't fully understand.</p><p>She had no reason to feel ashamed of herself for sleeping with Jack. She slept with a <em>lot</em> of fellows, most of whom she forgot the moment they pulled their pants back on and left the room.</p><p>"Well, anyway," said Jenny, "I was thinkin' about what you said when I asked you if you'd ever kissed a girl. You never done it, have ya?"</p><p>"I haven't had any reason to," David replied.</p><p>"Well ain'tcha curious at all?"</p><p>"Why are you so interested?"</p><p>Jenny could tell she was starting to make him nervous, and she enjoyed it more than she knew she ought to. She slipped her hand into David's, hardly knowing what she was doing anymore, and lowered her voice. " 'Cause I think you need to relax a bit, that's why. Besides, I never paid ya back for buyin' me breakfast the other day."</p><p>"You don't have to pay me back."</p><p>"But I <em>want</em> to. It's only fair, ain't it?"</p><p>David didn't answer and stared straight ahead, his arms stiff as he held Jenny's hand.</p><p>"You <em>are</em> curious," said Jenny. They approached a gap between two buildings, not quite wide enough to be called an alley, but plenty wide enough for two people, and she pulled David into this space.</p><p>"Jenny, what—" said David, but Jenny laughed and pulled him by the suspenders, cutting off his sentence as she pulled him in closer. Their faces were mere inches apart, close enough that Jenny could hear David breathe, and she didn't need to set things in motion because David was the one who leaned in and kissed her.</p><p>Jenny had been kissed so many times that the novelty wore off long ago, but something about kissing a cautious, inexperienced boy like David gave the act a new perspective. David was a bit awkward and clumsy at first, but Jenny helped him become more sure of his movements as she slipped an arm around his waist and kissed him back. It occurred to her that she liked provoking him, because she didn't understand him and wanted to see that polite, well-behaved exterior crack a bit. David wasn't like the other boys in Manhattan, or like anyone else she had met for that matter, and Jenny wanted him to kiss her because she wanted to hold onto him for as long as she could.</p><p>Their lips broke apart and David stared at her, his eyes impossibly blue and bright.</p><p>"Don't stop," Jenny whispered.</p><p>"I don't know what I'm doing," said David.</p><p>"Well you're doin' a damn good job of it."</p><p>But he didn't kiss her again, and all that warmth that flooded her body—a warmth she hadn't felt in ages—faded away when David remembered the papers he had tucked under his arm for safekeeping. "I have to work," he said apologetically, stepping away from her with a new onslaught of awkwardness.</p><p>"But you'll see me again?" Jenny asked.</p><p>"I shouldn't."</p><p>"But you will anyway. I know ya by now."</p><p>David looked like he was fighting back a smile and he absently touched his lips, as if remembering what had just taken place, then stepped further away from Jenny. "There's a dry goods store down the street from Tibby's restaurant. Meet me there tomorrow morning," he said, and then he was gone, off to sell the news to the people of New York, and Jenny was left with the aftermath of her actions.</p><p>She couldn't decide how she felt about David, which worried her a little, but she knew she would be at that store first thing tomorrow morning, whether she wanted to or not.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Shame</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jack figured he left his bandana in Jenny's room, which was a rare bit of foolishness on his part, and he felt naked without it as he sold the morning paper. He had been surprised to see her at the distribution center, and was even more surprised that she and David were still seeing each other, since he couldn't imagine what the hell the two of them had in common. If they weren't meeting up to get in bed together, then what did they keep running into each other for? If it had been any other fellow, Jack wouldn't have wondered about it too much, but this was <em>David</em>, and David just wasn't the kind of guy who kept company with whores, especially in broad daylight where anyone could see him.</p><p>Well. He supposed David could do whatever he liked. It wasn't like David wanted to get into Jenny's skirt or anything, and even if he did, it wouldn't affect anything Jack had done with her. Though he supposed he was in a bit of a dangerous position, since David was Sarah's brother, and if Sarah found out about Jenny then she might find out about Jack's involvement with her, and well...</p><p>Jack needed a cigarette.</p><p>He walked down the street, smoking between headlines, taking a drag after each story he called out, and all of a sudden there she was. Jenny's eyes lit up the moment she saw him and she hurried forward, carrying something red that Jack recognized as his missing bandana.</p><p>"I've been lookin' all over for ya," she said as she drew closer. "Here, you left this behind last night." She placed the bandana into Jack's hand.</p><p>"Thanks, doll," said Jack, giving her a grateful smirk. He put out his cigarette and tied the bandana around his neck, feeling complete once more, and figured it was just his luck that the girl he ought to forget was standing right in front of him. "What are you doing, runnin' around here anyway? There's no use tryin' to sell anything to Davey; you and me both know he's above that."</p><p>"And what makes ya think David's so important?" asked Jenny. "Every time I talk to ya it's Davey, Davey, Davey, ain't it?"</p><p>"Well ya see him an awful lot and I don't understand it."</p><p>"There ain't nothin' to understand. I'll see whoever I please."</p><p>"So you <em>is</em> screwin' him then."</p><p>Jenny's face was unreadable. "Maybe I am and maybe I ain't. It ain't your business either way."</p><p>That was one of the most frustrating things about whores; they were always so close-mouthed, and trying to get information out of them was like trying to talk sense into a brick wall. "Well you didn't come all this way just to return my bandana, did ya?" said Jack. "You was here to see Davey, too."</p><p>"And now ya think you're somethin' clever," she said.</p><p>"Hey, it don't take a genius to figure <em>you</em> out either."</p><p>"Well now that you've proved how observant you are, I better get home."</p><p>"How 'bout a kiss first?" said Jack.</p><p>"It's gonna cost ya," Jenny replied, and then she was gone, her head held high like she was suddenly too good to kiss him, even though she did a <em>whole</em> lot more than that last night.</p><p>When did she get all uppity anyway? Seeing a fellow like David didn't make her respectable all of a sudden, and she couldn't refuse Jack anything as long as he paid her for it. Of course, he had no intention of doing that anytime soon; his money was running out and he cared about Sarah, in spite of everything that had happened recently. Next time he ran into David he would invite himself over for supper that night, and he would do his best to forget that a hooker named Jenny had a strange sort of hold on him.</p><p>She wasn't worth losing Sarah over. Jenny was perfect for a good time once in a while, but Jack preferred a girl he didn't have to pay to spend time with.</p><p>"So, these here are the bets." After selling about ten papers, Jack heard Race's unmistakable voice and found him lounging against a streetlamp, surrounded by a few other newsies. "Whether or not Dave slept with his dame, how many times, and how much she charged him. Whaddya say, fellas? Are the bets on?"</p><p>Jack heard a number of agreements and felt a twinge of irritation. He was usually fond of Race and got along with him well, but something about his carefree, almost comical attitude towards David and Jenny bothered him. "Hey, Race," he said, approaching the streetlamp. "How's about bettin' on how often you lose at the track?"</p><p>"Got a problem, Cowboy?" Race asked.</p><p>"Yeah, I got a problem. Why don'tcha stay outta Davey's business?"</p><p>"Aw, we're just havin' fun, Jack," said Mush. "We don't mean no harm by it."</p><p>"Makes life more interestin', that's for sure," said Skittery. "What else have we got to entertain us? Lousy headlines? Countin' our meager pennies?"</p><p>"Skitts has got a point for once in his life," said Race. "We're just lookin' for some entertainment here, and there ain't nothing more entertainin' than the thought of Davey seein' a whore. I'm gonna remember this incident for the rest of my life, I tell ya."</p><p>Jack didn't think it was entertaining at all. He knew Jenny better than any of these bums did, for one thing, and sure, it was kind of amusing that David was seeing a whore, but it wasn't some vaudeville act at Irving Hall intended for their amusement. "Well I think the betting's a dumb idea," he said. "You fellas want money, then sell some headlines."</p><p>"Aw, you're just jealous," said Blink. "She's an awful pretty broad, ain't she?"</p><p>"Jealous?" said Jack. "That's the funniest thing I heard all week. I've had prettier broads in my time, and free of charge too."</p><p>Honestly, the thought of him being jealous was completely ridiculous. How could Jack possibly be jealous when he spent the last two nights in bed with Jenny, while there was no proof at all that David had done something similar? There was no point in arguing with Race on the subject of gambling, since Race was a hopeless addict and would gamble even if the whole world told him not to, so Jack said his farewells and went off to sell the rest of his papers, preferring to make money that was guaranteed instead of a gamble.</p><p>Jealous indeed. Yeah right.</p><hr/><p>Selling didn't go well for David and he knew it had nothing to do with the headlines. It was nearly impossible to focus on the news when his mind kept straying to Jenny's face so close to his, her hand on his waist, her lips on <em>his</em> lips...</p><p>But it was wrong. David had always assumed his first kiss would be with a perfectly nice girl that his family approved of, perhaps even the girl that he would marry, which he knew would please his mother. He never made girls a priority like the other newsies did, preferring to focus on his job and his family obligations, and now here he was, unable to work because he couldn't stop thinking about his first kiss.</p><p>His very first kiss with a girl had happened at last, and it was with a prostitute. David would never have another first kiss, nor could he take back what he had done, and he was ashamed of himself for giving into urges he didn't even realize he had. The closest he had ever been to a girl was the last time he hugged Sarah, which didn't count since she was his sister, and all it took was Jenny's face so close to his own to make him lose control.</p><p>Even worse, he asked her to meet him tomorrow morning while he was under the influence of... whatever it was that possessed him to kiss her. David never went back on his word, so he would have to meet her and tell her that he had made a mistake, and that he shouldn't see her again.</p><p>He had his morals to consider. There was nothing wrong with wanting to help Jenny, but temptation was a dangerous thing and it was better to remove himself from it before he did something he regretted. He wasn't like Jack, who went through life without feeling remorse for his actions, and he wasn't like Race, who could laugh off his mistakes and turn them into a joke. David took his every action seriously and weighed it on a scale of right and wrong.</p><p>Jenny was dangerous. It felt so terribly <em>good</em> to kiss her and if David didn't have such a good head on his shoulders, he might have carried on much longer than he had, and who knew what may have happened next?</p><p>"Read all about it!" David called down the street, but his heart wasn't in it. All his life, he had been fairly sure of himself and knew what kind of person he wanted to be, but now he wasn't so sure anymore.</p><p>What was right and what was wrong?</p><hr/><p>"Would you like more green beans, Jack?"</p><p>Sarah's voice seemed far away and Jack hadn't even realized he had eaten all of his beans until Sarah asked him the question. "Sure thing," he said, pushing his plate towards her. "Fill 'er up."</p><p>Jack was strongly reminded of the first time he ate with the Jacobs' family, back when he first met David. He had been affected by how normal the five Jacobs' were and he felt a bit out of place, but he easily brushed that off with his usual brash charm. Those feelings returned as he sat at the table with Sarah on one side of him and Les on the other, while Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs kept up a steady stream of light conversation. David, who sat right across from Jack, remained silent and barely acknowledged Jack, which suited him just fine.</p><p>Jack didn't belong at this perfectly good table with this perfectly good family, but he liked fooling himself into thinking that he did. It was simpler that way, and it helped chase away the guilt and shame that threatened to rise to the surface each time Sarah spoke to him. She scooped another helping of green beans onto Jack's plate, giving him that shy little smile she always put on when her parents were in the room, and Jack marveled at the fact that such a nice, pretty girl was his.</p><p>He supposed everything would be all right. It was unlikely that Sarah would ever find out about Jenny, after all.</p><p>"David, you're welcome to bring home a friend for supper if you like," said Mrs. Jacobs. "It's only fair when Sarah has Jack over so often."</p><p>David was pushing food around on his plate and looked up at his mother. "That isn't necessary, mama."</p><p>"Oh, I'm sure there's someone you would like to invite one evening. Have you met any nice girls?"</p><p>David wasn't very good at hiding his feelings and looked panicked for a moment, but he quickly composed himself. "No, mama. No girls at all."</p><p>"The boy is focused on his job," Mr. Jacobs said proudly.</p><p>David said nothing, but Jack was able to read his silence. He knew David had Jenny on his mind, which would have been funny if she wasn't on Jack's mind as well. He supposed the biggest difference between his and David's involvement with Jenny was that David had people who would be concerned if they knew he was seeing a whore, while Jack was free to do as he pleased without anyone caring whether it was good or bad.</p><p>Jack found himself sneaking glances at David and realized that if David <em>did</em> screw Jenny, then the two of them would have been with the same girl, which was kind of unsettling. Of course, Jenny was a whore, which meant that Jack was sharing her with a whole lot of fellows, but David was somebody he knew and besides, he was <em>David</em>. It was just... it was something Jack didn't want to think about too hard.</p><p>"Thanks for the meal, Mrs. Jacobs," Jack said once the supper was over. "I'm gonna head out and say goodbye to Sarah, if ya don't mind."</p><p>Neither of Sarah's parents minded and Jack took her out onto the fire escape, the only place they could get any privacy in the small tenement. Without saying a word, Sarah glanced behind her to make sure her family couldn't see, then moved in closer to Jack and kissed him, lightly and without any fire. Jack forced himself not to think of Jenny, who had passion running through every fiber of her being, and reminded himself that Sarah was innocent, and that he was doing her a favor by taking his urges out on Jenny. Why should he make Sarah uncomfortable by pressuring her into something when he could just relieve himself with a girl like Jenny, who he had no emotional attachment towards?</p><p>Jack gave in and deepened his kiss with Sarah. Yeah, he was definitely doing her a favor.</p><p>"I wanna take ya out sometime," Jack said, tucking a loose strand of hair behind Sarah's ear. "Show you off at Irving Hall or somethin'. Whaddya say?"</p><p>"When?" Sarah asked.</p><p>Jack hesitated. He had spent most of his money at the brothel the last couple of nights, which meant he would have to work extra hard at selling papers if he wanted to spend money on Sarah. "Eh, maybe in a coupla days," he said vaguely. "I'll let ya know, all right?"</p><p>"That sounds wonderful," said Sarah. She leaned in to kiss Jack again when David's voice reached the fire escape, interrupting them.</p><p>"Sarah? Mama wants you to wash the dishes."</p><p>Sarah regretfully pulled away from Jack and took him by the hand so she could give it a squeeze. "Goodbye," she said, then climbed back into the apartment.</p><p>David soon replaced her and looked out onto the fire escape at Jack. "Well," he said a bit awkwardly. "I'll see you tomorrow."</p><p>"Hey, wait," said Jack. "I wanna talk to ya for a moment."</p><p>David hesitated, then climbed out onto the fire escape and stood beside Jack, keeping a safe distance from him. "What is it?"</p><p>"So, uh, you and that whore. What was her name again?"</p><p>"Jenny."</p><p>"Yeah, that's right. Jenny. So you ever sleep with her yet?"</p><p>"Why are you so interested?" David asked.</p><p>"Cause she keeps comin' around and seein' ya, that's why," said Jack. "And it ain't just me that's interested, either. Did ya know Race and the other fellas have got some bets runnin' about you and her? I need some extra dough to take Sarah out and I could win a little extra offa Race if ya give me some tips about you and Jenny."</p><p>Jack felt like a genius that evening.</p><p>"Well I haven't done anything worth betting on," David replied, sounding a bit irritated. "And I would appreciate it if you didn't ask me again."</p><p>"What, she hang around ya 'cause she likes your personality or somethin'? A girl like her?"</p><p>"It's hard to explain, and I wouldn't expect you to understand, Jack. Jenny is a friend of mine, no matter what she is, and she talks to me because I'm the only fella who doesn't think about buying her."</p><p>Well. At least Jack was assured that David hadn't screwed Jenny, which made him feel a whole lot better about the situation. "Well good for you then," said Jack. "Have fun with your friendship and everything. I'll see ya tomorrow, all right?"</p><p>He climbed down the fire escape, out into New York's dark streets, and felt his shame melt away. Not only was he doing Sarah a favor, but he also had no need to feel any guilt towards David, since he and David obviously didn't sleep with the same girl. And even if they ever did, well, Jenny was a whore, and that was all there was to it.</p><p>Jack Kelly was a liar and a sinner, but his conscience felt a bit easier as he made his way to the lodging house.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Doubt</h2></a>
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    <p>"Where ya been at night, Cowboy?" Boots asked as Jack entered the bunk room of the lodging house.</p><p>"Havin' dinner at Sarah and David's," Jack replied. He removed his red bandana from around his neck, then collapsed onto his bunk, ready to shut his eyes and fall asleep as soon as possible. He hadn't gotten a whole lot of rest lately, what with him going to see Jenny and all.</p><p>"Ya had dinner with 'em three nights in a row?" Blink asked skeptically. "Ya never mentioned it before."</p><p>"No, of course not," said Jack.</p><p>Crutchy came hobbling down the row of bunks, his crutch making a distinctive thump each time he took a step. "I heard ya come in <em>real</em> late last night," he said with enthusiasm. "And the night before that too! Say, no wonder ya look so tired in the mornin's."</p><p>"Jacky's got himself a girl on the side!" Mush guessed. "Don'tcha, Jack?"</p><p>"Fellas, I'm tryin' to sleep," Jack grumbled, burying his head beneath his pillow. He hated how quickly Mush got to the truth, but he really <em>was</em> tried, and it wasn't a good time for him to come up with a story that would explain his absences at night. Jack lied best when he was wide-awake.</p><p>"Aw, come on," said Blink. "Who is she?"</p><p>"I'm tellin' ya, there ain't no other girl," said Jack. "Now would ya quit makin' so much racket?"</p><p>"Maybe he's seeing a hooker?" Mush hissed to nobody in particular, and Jack found himself tensing up. "Makes sense, don't it?"</p><p>"Hey, don't talk like that, will ya?" said Skittery. "Tumbler ain't asleep yet."</p><p>The conversation died down, but Jack still heard a few whispers here and there and wished they all had better things to do with their time, and more worthwhile things to think about, but the truth was that life as a newsie was bleak, and they all took to meddling in each other's lives because there was nothing else of interest for them to bother with. Every time something happened with one of the boys, no matter how insignificant it was, somebody was bound to make a big deal out of it and annoy the poor fellow. Jack was used to that sort of thing, but it didn't sit well with him when he got teased for something he was trying to keep a secret, and it was even worse when the boys hit dangerously close to the truth.</p><p>He normally wouldn't mind if everyone knew he was seeing a girl, even if she was a whore, but the circumstances demanded secrecy. Nobody but Jenny and himself knew what had taken place between them, and he intended to keep things that way if he wanted to stay out of trouble. Yeah, he supposed he was playing a dangerous game with Jenny, but he could quit it any time he wanted to. In fact, he would refuse to see her the next day just to show himself that he was in control, and that he wouldn't let any girl influence his life.</p><p>Also, he would have to come up with some good reasons for why he came in so late those last couple of nights, but it could wait until the morning. It occurred to him that people were starting to get suspicious, and that if he wasn't careful he would get caught, which was even more of a reason to stay away from Jenny for a while. The last thing he needed was some loudmouth like Race or Blink telling Sarah all about his nighttime wanderings.</p><p>He could see the scenario in his head, and it involved Sarah throwing crockery at him and Mrs. Jacobs chasing him out of their apartment with a broom. He'd never been chased out of a girl's home before, but that didn't mean it could never happen.</p><p>"Say, do ya think Davey's seein' his whore tonight?" somebody whispered.</p><p>"Willin' to bet on it?" said a whisper that was distinctly Race's.</p><p>Jack resisted the urge to groan into his pillow. Not <em>that</em> whole issue again. He had better fall asleep as soon as possible so he wouldn't have to think about Jenny, or David, or anything else for the rest of the night.</p><hr/><p>David loitered in front of the dry goods store, stack of papers clutched in his hands, and he managed to sell off a few copies of the morning edition while he waited for Jenny to arrive. He had practiced what he was going to say to her during his walk through the streets, and he concluded that he valued her friendship and wanted to help her as best as he could, but he couldn't be alone with her anymore and certainly could not, under any circumstances, kiss her again. He couldn't imagine why she was so bent on kissing him in the first place, anyway; he was certainly no Jack Kelly, for one thing, and he had made it perfectly clear from the beginning that he valued his sense of moral propriety. His father had always told him to respect girls and wait until he was married, and Jenny would just have to understand that.</p><p>He supposed that if he didn't feel so strongly about right and wrong, he wouldn't have stopped Jenny from stealing and could have prevented the whole mess, but he didn't regret what he had done. He didn't regret meeting her, even if he <em>did</em> regret kissing her, and it was hard to imagine a life without Jenny in it, even if he had only known her for a few days.</p><p>He would have never guessed that preventing thievery would lead to so many complications.</p><p>David felt a bit guilty as he stood there alone, because he had told Les yet again that he couldn't sell papers with him, and he turned down Mush's offer to go selling together. He hated withdrawing from his friends and family almost as much as he hated lying, and it was a shame that he had to conduct himself with discretion when Jenny was really a sweet, likeable girl who couldn't help what she was. It was an even bigger shame that she <em>was</em> what she was, but David had tackled that issue already and came away without any solutions.</p><p>"Mornin', David," said Jenny, looking pretty in a blue dress that matched her eyes. "How's the sellin'?"</p><p>"Good enough," said David. He wanted to tell her his thoughts right then and there, but somehow his brain, which had never failed him before, couldn't remember what he wanted to say.</p><p>"Well I'm glad to hear that," said Jenny. She smiled at him in an innocent way for a moment, making it even harder for David to speak up, and then stepped closer to him and did something he certainly did not expect: she leaned in and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Ya wanna go have breakfast or somethin'?"</p><p>"I can't," said David. "I mean, I don't think you understand." His face was burning and he hoped none of his fellow newsies were nearby.</p><p>"What ain't there to understand?" said Jenny. "You asked me to meet you here, didn't ya?"</p><p>"Yes, well I think we need to establish some boundaries if we're going to see each other."</p><p>"And what's that s'posed to mean?"</p><p>David was stuck. When he was alone with his thoughts, it had been so easy to decide that any physical contact between them should be strictly forbidden, but now that Jenny was here, right in front of him, it was much harder to stick to that plan. "It... it wouldn't be proper for us to kiss, for one thing."</p><p>Jenny laughed. "Proper? You're talkin' to <em>me</em> about proper? David, you're just a newsie and I'm a whore. We ain't fancy society people who hafta follow rules, so don't worry your head about what's proper."</p><p>"I'm worried about what's proper for <em>me</em>, Jenny, and what I feel is right."</p><p>"Well as far as I remember, <em>you</em> kissed <em>me</em> yesterday, so now you're contradictin' yourself."</p><p>David knew he was caught in a trap, and all the arguing in the world wouldn't change the validity of Jenny's statement. And yet he liked the fact that she could use words against him, because it demonstrated her cleverness, and David had always promised himself that he would never take time with a girl who wasn't clever. Not that he planned to take things any further with Jenny, because he certainly didn't, but he appreciated her quick mind all the same. "You're right," he said. "But it won't happen again."</p><p>"So we're callin' it quits then?"</p><p>"We don't have to call it quits. We can still have breakfast, if you want to."</p><p>Jenny gazed at him, blue eyes staring into blue, and then she looked away and sighed. "I don't blame ya. You oughtta be spendin' your time with a respectable girl, one you don't hafta be ashamed of."</p><p>"I'm not ashamed of you. Maybe I can look around, find out if they're offering work and board for girls, and you can change everything."</p><p>"It ain't that easy, David. The people who hire want girls who've had real workin' experience. Ya know why it was so easy for me to take a job that involves lifting my skirts?"</p><p>"Why?" asked David.</p><p>"It's somethin' I already knew how to do," Jenny said, straight-forward and direct. "I ain't had the opportunities that'll get me somewhere in life."</p><p>It was perfectly clear that David should part ways with a girl like this. He knew nothing about Jenny and couldn't even begin to imagine what her life must have been like, and sooner or later he would get himself into trouble. He should stick to his original plan and be firm with her, but uncertainty crept into his mind with every word she spoke, and he wasn't so sure if he really, truly didn't want to kiss her again. David wasn't used to these feelings that warred inside him, having never gotten so close with a girl before, and he didn't know what to do anymore.</p><p>Why did this particular girl have to turn his thoughts and feelings upside-down?</p><p>"Well, I still want to be a friend to you," said David. "I'm perfectly aware of what you are, but I like being around you, and I know you could use a friend."</p><p>"No one's said that to me in a long time," said Jenny. "You don't make too many friends in my line of business."</p><p>"We can still have a cup of coffee, if you want."</p><p>"Oh, I'm sure you've got work to do." Something in Jenny's face had changed; she looked almost troubled, and she avoided David's eyes. "I don't wanna keep you from makin' a profit."</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>"I'm real sure, David. Have fun sellin' those papers, all right?"</p><p>David couldn't interpret this change of mood, but it felt like Jenny was a little <em>afraid</em> of him, which didn't make any sense. She smiled and waved goodbye like she normally did, though she seemed in a hurry to get away from him, and David resumed selling papers with a sinking heart. He didn't know how much he valued Jenny's opinion of him until she turned away from him, and it hurt. He made his way to Central Park, where the selling was usually good, and saw couples strolling everywhere, old, young, rich, and poor. They all made it look so easy, and David had to admit that he was curious.</p><p>What was it like to be with a girl? He had wondered about it before he met Jenny, but he never gave it any serious consideration and had never bothered to find out for himself. He wasn't like the other newsies, who had no trouble getting together with various girls at Irving Hall, and the very thought of girls made him feel embarrassed.</p><p>But still, David was curious, and he was curious about Jenny most of all.</p><hr/><p>Jenny felt bad for running out on David, but she had to get away. As much as she liked him and enjoyed their conversations, and as much as she had enjoyed kissing him, she was afraid of how much he cared. Every other boy who took an interest in her, Jack Kelly included, only wanted to give her money in exchange for pleasure, and Jenny had learned to accept that. She didn't believe in love, hadn't believed in love for quite a long time, and didn't plan to believe in love anytime soon. She couldn't afford it, because love sure as hell wouldn't keep her fed and clothed, and Jenny was interested in self-preservation above anything else.</p><p>David suddenly frightened her because after months of being used, she had met someone who actually cared about her, and she couldn't be with him even if she wanted to. She was better off keeping her distance from a boy like him, but of course she knew that already.</p><p>When Jenny returned to the brothel she found Kitty in the parlor, lounging on the sofa reading through the fashion pages of a lady's magazine. Kitty always had big ideas about living on Fifth Avenue and attending balls, but as far as Jenny knew she was just as trapped as the rest of Mrs. Johnson's girls. Jenny intended to steal away upstairs without being seen, but Kitty heard her enter the house and looked right at her, a lazy smile on her lips.</p><p>"Where ya been slippin' off to lately?" Kitty asked.</p><p>Jenny froze and forced a smile on her face. "Whaddya mean? Last time I looked, you wasn't my mother."</p><p>"Well you've been leavin' early every mornin'. Can't imagine what's so fascinating out there."</p><p>"Then why are ya askin' about it?"</p><p>Kitty's lazy smile began to harden. " 'Cause Gina coulda swore she saw you with a boy yesterday mornin'."</p><p>"Oh yeah? What did he look like?"</p><p>"Gina said he was wearin' a cowboy hat. Sounds an awful lot like a certain cowboy who dropped in the other night and wanted to see ya."</p><p>At first Jenny was confused, but then she remembered that she had returned Jack's bandana yesterday, and she couldn't help but be relieved. She didn't know what she would do if she had been caught with David. "Oh, him?" she said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "The fool left his bandana in my room. I was just returnin' it."</p><p>"You went out of your way just to return a silly bandana?" Kitty asked, no longer pretending to smile at this point. "You coulda waited for him to come back for it, or even kept the damn thing. You went out to see him again this mornin', didn'tcha? Any other bits of clothing he forgot?"</p><p>"Ain't none of your business if I <em>did</em> see him," said Jenny.</p><p>"Oh, but it <em>is</em> my business, 'cause ya know perfectly well Mrs. Johnson don't allow us to have 'dalliances' as she calls 'em. Men are strictly for business and business only."</p><p>Jenny had never been fond of Kitty, but now she was tempted to snatch that lady's magazine out of her dainty hands and smack her head with it. "Well I'm tellin' the truth about the cowboy, and you can believe me if ya want. He ain't a dalliance, or anything like that, and if you go spreadin' tales to Mrs. Johnson I'll tell her about the time you stole one of her necklaces. She still thinks our former kitchen maid took it."</p><p>Kitty pressed her mouth into a thin line, her eyes expressing utmost annoyance, and she re-absorbed herself in her magazine without saying another word. Jenny did not consider this to be a victory, since there was rarely such a thing as victory when Kitty was your opponent, and she headed upstairs feeling much more tired than she felt a few minutes ago. It had occurred to her that the other girls from the brothel might see her when she interacted with Jack and David, but it never seemed likely until Kitty informed her that she had been spotted.</p><p>It was only another reason why she should keep her distance from David, and she reminded herself that she had done the right thing without a doubt.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Deceit</h2></a>
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    <p>It had been two days since David last saw Jenny and her face refused to leave his mind. He saw her when he went to bed at night, he saw her when he got up in the morning, and he saw her when he stood on street corners selling his papers. He kept reminding himself that she was a prostitute, a whore, a girl of ill repute, but then he would remember that no, Jenny was more than that, and she deserved a life that was better than the one she was living. After two days of thinking on it, he still couldn't figure out why she had turned away from him so quickly and wondered if he had done something wrong, or if she was simply tired of him. Did he manage to bore her with only one kiss, or was there some deeper meaning that David had yet to figure out?</p><p>He decided to voice his confused thoughts as he sold the morning edition with Mush, who was delighted that David had agreed to sell with him that morning. The two of them stood on a corner together, caps pulled low on their heads to ward off the chill, and David waited for a decrease in passerby before he spoke up.</p><p>"Mush, you tend to see... girls quite often, don't you?" he asked.</p><p>Mush laughed at his question, but then again, Mush laughed at nearly everything. "Why do you wanna know?" he asked.</p><p>"Because I've never been with one before," David confessed. "Aside from talking to them."</p><p>Mush wasn't laughing anymore; instead he gaped at David and couldn't keep his voice down. "Wait, but what about what's-her-name? Ain'tcha sleepin' with her?"</p><p>"<em>Mush</em>," said David, shushing him. "No, I'm not."</p><p>"Coulda told me that earlier. I bet Race you was doin' her every other night."</p><p>"Well I'm not, and you can tell that to Race."</p><p>"All right, I believe ya, but what're you askin' me about girls for?"</p><p>David figured that if he was going to be honest with any of the newsies, Mush was a good choice because he was willing to be helpful and wouldn't tease him as badly as the other boys would. "I'm asking you because I'm curious, and you seem to have the most luck out of all of us."</p><p>"Eh, gettin' girls ain't no trouble, really," said Mush. "All ya gotta do is smile and don't be shy, and they flock right to ya."</p><p>David tried to imagine girls of his own class and circle, girls that he could take out to Irving Hall and kiss out on his fire escape afterwards, but the only girl that came to mind was Jenny, and he knew right then and there that he had a problem on his hands. "What if she's a girl you shouldn't be with?"</p><p>"Ya really like that dame from the brothel, don'tcha?"</p><p>"Yes," said David, glad to say it at last. "I like her a lot, but she ran from me yesterday."</p><p>"Well don't ask me to read her mind," said Mush. "I know how to <em>get</em> dames, but I ain't no expert on reading 'em. Why don'tcha try askin' Jack about this stuff? I bet Jack could help ya!"</p><p>It was typical of Mush to assume that Jack could solve anything, and David couldn't bring himself to confess that he and Jack hadn't spoken much lately. The two of them had been awkward with one another for days without ceasing, and David couldn't imagine what he could have done to make Jack want to avoid him. They hadn't had the most harmonious friendship, but David couldn't deny that Jack was his closest friend among the newsies, and he wished he <em>could</em> talk to him.</p><p>David just shook his head at Mush, knowing he had said enough already. "No, you've been helpful. Thanks, Mush."</p><p>"Yeah, well good luck with that girl of yours. She's quite a looker."</p><p>"Thanks. But do me a favor, Mush?"</p><p>"Yeah?"</p><p>"Try to call off those bets Race is running, all right? It's useless."</p><p>Mush agreed, but David soon learned that he had spoken too late, because during the lunch hour he discovered that Spot Conlon was visiting from Brooklyn and heard the whole story from Race. Spot didn't intimidate David in the least bit, but he had a way of looking at people and assessing them like he could see into their heads, and David supposed that was because of his numerous spies who ran throughout New York and reported the doings of every newsie. David wouldn't be surprised if Spot found out about Jenny days in advance and was visiting Manhattan specifically to learn more about David's personal life, which only made things more frustrating.</p><p>David ran into Spot quite by accident, though he supposed their meeting was inevitable given the circumstances. There Spot was inside of Lou's restaurant, playing a round of poker with Race and some of the other boys, but he halted the game as soon as David and Mush walked in. "Well if it ain't the Walkin' Mouth," said Spot, throwing his hand of cards upon the table as if it was nothing more than spare newsprint. "Been hearin' some things about ya, Davey."</p><p>"And I bet half of them aren't true," David said as he approached the table. "Newsies make the headlines; they're just as good at making the gossip as well." He directed this last comment at Race, who puffed away on his customary cigar and looked amused rather than guilty.</p><p>"Pretty sure I can sort the truth from the lies, Davey," said Spot. "And it ain't none of my business if you're seein' a whore or not."</p><p>"Spot didn't even bother placin' any bets," Race broke in. "Prob'ly 'cause I keep beatin' him at poker and he knows he'll lose all his dough to me."</p><p>"Ya know that ain't true," said Spot, giving Race a playful punch in the arm.</p><p>David and Mush both took seats at the table and David noticed that once again, Jack wasn't part of the group, and he felt annoyed without knowing why. "Well if you're not betting," he told Spot, "then you're the only newsie who hasn't taken an unhealthy interest in my personal affairs."</p><p>Spot shrugged and sipped his root beer. "I always figured you could use a girl to lighten up a bit. If you're seein' a whore, then good for you; that's all I gotta say."</p><p>" 'Cept Davey ain't sleepin' with her," said Mush.</p><p>"How do ya know that?" Race demanded.</p><p>"I told him," said David. He had given up on trying to keep anything a secret anymore; honesty was always the best policy anyway and the truth always came out, especially where girls were concerned.</p><p>"Eh, whether you're screwin' her or not, you're still seein' a girl," said Spot. "As long as you ain't attached to her, ya know? 'Cause she <em>is</em> a whore. Think of all those fellas you gotta share her with, like Jacky for instance."</p><p>David never knew that one little name could make his heart speed up. "What?"</p><p>"Say, what's this about Jacky-boy?" asked Race.</p><p>Spot smirked at them, pleased that he knew something they didn't. "I know this girl from your dame's brothel, Davey. Her name's Gina, nice little Italian girl, and when I saw her last night we got to talkin' after we was done with everything else, and somehow Jack came up in the conversation. Gina said she saw your Jenny talkin' to Jack the other day, though she didn't know why."</p><p>David couldn't help but wonder if that was why Jack was avoiding him. "Doesn't sound like a big deal to me," he said, putting on a brave face. "You and I are talking, but that doesn't mean I'm going to kiss you or anything."</p><p>"Ya know, Jack's been comin' home late these last few nights," said Mush. "I'm sure it don't mean nothin' though, right?"</p><p>"Right," David echoed.</p><p>Did it matter if Jack happened to have a conversation with Jenny on the streets? They were both free to speak with whoever they pleased and David had no right to stop them, even if he had the power to do so. Except one detail bothered him, and the more he tried to forget it the more it kept troubling him. If Jack was acquainted with Jenny and spoke with her within the last few days, then why did he act like he didn't know her name every time he and David talked about her? Why did he keep asking David if he and Jenny were more than friends, and why was he satisfied when David assured him that nothing had happened?</p><p>Why wasn't Jack at Lou's that afternoon?</p><p>"Anyone seen Jack at all today?" David asked.</p><p>"Yeah, saw him at the distribution center," said Race. "Other than that? Ain't seen him at all."</p><p>"Jacky-boy'll show up," Spot said casually. "He knows I'm in Manhattan, ya see. Whaddya wanna talk to him for anyway?"</p><p>David met Spot's eyes across the table and suspected that Spot already knew, but he was asking for the sake of hearing it from his mouth. "I want to ask him over for supper," David said. He didn't consider it to be a lie, but merely a piece of artillery in the never-ending verbal battle Spot liked to engage in.</p><p>Spot didn't bother asking him again.</p><p>The next few hours passed and David didn't actively seek Jack out, but he kept his eyes open for any sign of him. He also kept his eyes open for Jenny, just in case she was out and about, but he was forced to make do with visions of her in his mind. Where had she been for the last two days? Was she eating properly and receiving fair treatment from Mrs. Johnson? Did she ever think about him, or had she forgotten his existence entirely? He thought he could figure girls out if he asked advice from somebody like Mush, but he was no closer to figuring out Jenny than he was on the day he met her.</p><p>David reached his own street and headed to his tenement, ready to sit up in bed with a good book and distract himself, when he saw a familiar cowboy hat up ahead. He had found Jack at last, not far from his own doorstep.</p><p>"Jack!" David called out.</p><p>The figure up ahead paused, as if unsure he had heard properly, then turned around to face David. It was Jack, all right, and as David drew closer to him all the old feelings of annoyance flared to life, forcing him to remember all the times he and Jack had been awkward with one another in recent days. "Where are you headed?" David asked outright.</p><p>"I'm seein' Sarah," said Jack. The streets were growing dark and he shoved his hands into his pockets, looking directly at David as if challenging him to question this statement. "You gonna stop me or somethin'?"</p><p>"No, Jack. I'm not going to stop you. Come on, let's go up on the fire escape."</p><p>Jack didn't protest and they walked side-by-side, uncomfortably silent as if they hardly knew each other, and David waited until they had climbed up onto the Jacobs' fire escape before speaking up again. "What did you and Jenny talk about the other day?"</p><p>Jack didn't even flinch. "Who says we talked?"</p><p>"Does it matter? I'm just curious."</p><p>"Yeah, we talked a bit. I ran into her on the street when I was sellin' papes, so I figured I'd say hi."</p><p>Jack sounded confidant enough and he even looked David in the eyes as he spoke, but that was just typical Jack Kelly, and it was hard to tell what was the truth and what was a lie when he improved the truth so often. "It's kind of strange how you asked me about her before," said David. "And you didn't seem to know her name."</p><p>"Yeah, well it's a big city, Davey," said Jack. "You expect me to remember a million names off the top of my head?"</p><p>Jack was defensive, and David had been friends with him long enough to know that Jack got defensive when he was protecting his lies. "I don't understand why it has to be such a secret," said David. "If you want to talk to Jenny, then fine. It's not like I own her or anything."</p><p>"All right, then," said Jack. "Maybe I saw her a coupla times before that. So what? She's a sweet girl as far as whores go, and she likes ya."</p><p>"She talks about me?" said David, surprised.</p><p>"Oh yeah, you're all she ever talks about." Jack gave David a reassuring clap on the shoulder, a gesture he hadn't performed in ages. "Relax, Davey. Jenny and me, we're just friends."</p><p>David still wasn't sure if he should believe Jack, but he wanted to believe him more than anything.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Weakness</h2></a>
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    <p>Jenny was familiar with Spot Conlon. Every girl in the house was familiar with Spot Conlon, even though he hailed from Brooklyn, and when he dropped in for the second night in a row Jenny watched him with more interest than usual. Spot wasn't dashing like Jack or good-hearted like David, but he had a certain charisma that drew all eyes upon him in spite of his youth, and he may have been only a newsie but he carried confidence upon his shoulders, as if being a newsie was the most important job in the world. And to Spot it probably was, especially when it kept him from starving on the streets, and Jenny hung around the parlor watching him smoke a cigarette with some of the girls, customary cane tucked under one suspender and his slingshot kept in his back pocket.</p><p>Mostly Jenny was interested because Spot was a newsie, just like Jack and David.</p><p>The usual girls were gathered around the parlor, including Kitty, hoping to be the star attraction as usual; Gina, who Spot usually favored; and Charlene, the newest girl, who only put herself forward so she wouldn't get thrown out on the streets. Jenny leaned against the parlor wall, a glass of wine in her hand, and occasionally smiled up at the thirty-something year-old man who let his eyes stray down to the neckline of her dress. She would probably have no choice but to show this man upstairs sooner or later, but she would postpone that for as long as possible in hopes of catching a word with Spot.</p><p>"What's your name, fella?" she asked the man beside her.</p><p>"George," he said, though he didn't meet her eyes as he responded. They were still fixated firmly upon the tantalizing dip of her neckline.</p><p>"Well, George, you could use another drink, couldn't ya? Lemme go fetch ya one."</p><p>He readily agreed and Jenny made her way through the mixture of whores and johns, keeping Spot Conlon in the corner of her eye as she walked. He took lazy drags on his cigarette and chuckled at something one of the girls had said, and Jenny finished her glass of wine before snagging a fresh one from the maid, planning a way to talk to Spot as she did so. Poor George would have to make do with someone else that evening, and Jenny knew exactly who that would be.</p><p>"Say, Kitty," she said, sidling up to the chair Kitty was lounging on. "There's a fella over there who's just itchin' to go upstairs. I tried to get him interested, but the ass informed me that I ain't his type, so why don'tcha give him a shot?"</p><p>Kitty ran a hand through her pinned-back curls, her usual smirk in place. "Why that's just a pity, ain't it, Jenny? Losin' your touch, are ya? Show me which fella it is."</p><p>"The one standin' against the wall there, with the brown jacket and the thin mustache."</p><p>"Well <em>somebody</em> oughtta help the poor man out. Lemme take care of him."</p><p>Kitty got up and sailed over to George, and Jenny edged closer to Spot, who was in the process of lighting a cigarette for Gina, a black-haired girl whose street accent was tinged with Italian. "Care for a drink?" Jenny asked, offering her wineglass to Spot.</p><p>"Don't mind if I do, doll," he said, turning his steady, serious gaze upon her. For someone who hadn't reached adulthood yet, Spot looked and acted like someone who had already seen a great deal of the world, though Jenny doubted he had ever set foot outside of New York. Deep down he was truly no different from any of the other ragged boys who ran the streets selling papers, no different from Jenny herself, who sold all she had to keep food in her mouth.</p><p>"Say," said Spot, peering more closely at her. "Ya look familiar. You been here a while, haven't ya?"</p><p>"The name's Jenny," she said. "And yeah, I been here a while now."</p><p>"Jenny," he echoed, looking at her with a spark of interest in his eyes. "Well I've certainly heard of ya."</p><p>"And yet you ain't never had me before, have ya? Shame on you."</p><p>Gina remained standing by Spot, her newly lit cigarette grasped between her fingers, and she used her free hand to tug gently upon one of Spot's red suspenders. "<em>Rosso</em>, you're takin' me upstairs, yes? I've been waitin' for you all night."</p><p>"I'll take ya up tomorrow, <em>bella</em>," said Spot. "I got a little somethin' I wanna do first."</p><p>Gina looked put out, her brown eyes pleading at Spot, but he ignored her and placed his hand on Jenny's lower back so he could guide her across the parlor and up the stairs. Jenny didn't particularly want to sleep with Spot, but he was better than George and she was curious about how he had heard of her when they had never come directly face-to-face. Here she was, taking another newsie up to her room, and yet it still wasn't the one newsie she wouldn't have minded spending the night with, but she supposed she would rather have Spot than Jack. The thought of Jack only made her feel guilty, and Jenny couldn't afford to be guilty.</p><p>"So how'd ya hear of me?" Jenny asked the moment they were inside her tiny room.</p><p>Spot wasted no time depositing his cane and his slingslot upon Jenny's dresser. "Your name's gettin' quite famous 'round Manhattan, doll. Kinda hard <em>not</em> to hear of ya when you're a newsie."</p><p>"And who's been tellin' tales about me, huh?"</p><p>"Maybe I'll tell ya after I get my money's worth."</p><p>Jenny was quickly learning that newsies were even shrewder than whores when it came to money, so she didn't argue and gave Spot what he had come for, noticing that he did the deed the same way he did anything else—cool and calculated, with just the right amount of dedication. He started smoking immediately afterwards, just like Jack did, and Jenny remembered that she had never seen David smoke in all the time she had known him, unlike most of the other newsies. Smoking didn't suit David, though it suited Spot, who seemed to have a constant need to have something in his hands, whether it was a cigarette, his cane, or whatever happened to be within reach.</p><p>"So how well do ya know the Manhattan newsies?" Jenny asked, turning her head to face him. He sat up in bed beside her with his pants back on, smoking away as if he owned the bed, the room, and the whole brothel to boot.</p><p>"Well enough," said Spot. "Since the strike I been checkin' up on 'em every now and then."</p><p>"So ya must know Jack Kelly."</p><p>"Yeah, and David Jacobs too, which is what you're really tryin' to ask me, ain't it?"</p><p>"And why would I be askin' about David Jacobs?"</p><p>"Dangerous game you're playin' here," said Spot, ignoring her question. "Gettin' acquainted with a boy like Davey. What's in it for <em>you</em> anyway? He ain't payin' you nothin'."</p><p>What <em>was</em> in it for Jenny? Nothing really, except for the rare feeling that perhaps she wasn't hopeless after all, and that was enough to keep her from saying goodbye to David for good. "It ain't your business why I'm acquainted with David," she said. "I'll see who I please."</p><p>"I ain't judgin' ya, girlie," said Spot. "Davey's an uptight kinda guy, so you'd be doin' him a favor if ya took him to bed one of these days. Get him to loosen up."</p><p>"Oh really?"</p><p>"Yeah, really. Davey helped win the strike against Pulitzer coupla months ago, so I owe him one."</p><p>"Well you're a real nice friend, now ain'tcha?"</p><p>Spot took a disdainful drag on his cigarette. "I don't want Davey and Jack gettin' in a fight over you, 'else it'll undo all that unity we worked for. I figure Davey won't make trouble with Jack if he's got a claim on ya, know what I mean?"</p><p>"Yeah, I know what ya mean," said Jenny. "But I don't get how you know so much."</p><p>"Little bird told me," Spot said with a smirk.</p><p>"Well next time ya see David, tell him I wanna see him again. Tell him to come and visit me, will ya?"</p><p>"I'm headin' back to Brooklyn tomorrow, but I'll tell him first thing in the mornin', all right?"</p><p>Jenny was satisfied with that response and fell silent, watching Spot finish his cigarette and put the rest of his clothes back in order. The slingshot ended up in its rightful pocket and the cane slid back under the red suspender, firmly in place, and Jenny compared these items to Jack's cowboy hat and red bandana. Did all important newsies carry props or did Jack and Spot simply possess more ego than the others? "What's the cane for?" she asked.</p><p>Spot smirked at her again. "Bustin' open people's heads, that's what."</p><p>"Now that's a lie, Conlon. I'm a whore but I ain't stupid."</p><p>"Well it ain't none of your business, just like it ain't my business why you're seein' Davey. Now we're even."</p><p>"All right," said Jenny. "We're even. So long now, and don'tcha forget to talk to David."</p><p>Spot nodded his head at her, his way of silently saying goodbye, and sauntered from the room with one hand upon the tip of his cane. Jenny brushed out her hair, which had gotten tangled during her time with Spot, and reflected upon her own confused, often hypocritical, actions. Just a couple of days ago she decided that she and David shouldn't see each other anymore, and now she was passing messages so he could come visit her. Jenny didn't love David and doubted she ever would, but David was a breath of fresh air after countless hours performing acts she could happily do without, and Jenny liked breathing just as much as she liked food and sleep.</p><hr/><p>David let himself into the brothel without bothering to knock, partially because he was too impatient to wait around and partially because he was too self-conscious to speak to anybody at the moment, aside from the person he had come to see. He could hardly believe it when Spot came up to him at the distribution center and said that Jenny wanted to talk to him, and just when he was about to ask how Spot had acquired this surprising information, Spot shut his mouth and walked away, claiming that Brooklyn needed him. The circumstances were suspicious but David couldn't possibly stay away, not when he and Jenny had parted so abruptly in front of the dry goods store.</p><p>The house was quiet, probably typical at such an early hour, and David found Jenny's room without encountering a soul. Nothing but a wall separated him from Jenny and he could easily walk away, back to the world of order and morality, but David had known long ago that he was in too deep to walk away from Jenny, even when he stood on forbidden territory. David steadied himself and knocked on the door.</p><p>Jenny answered before he could think of walking away. "Good to see ya again, David. Why don'tcha come in?" She took him by the hand so she could pull him inside, and David didn't protest.</p><p>"I'm surprised you wanted to see me," said David.</p><p>"I'm surprised you actually showed up," said Jenny. "I thought you was all concerned about what's proper."</p><p>"Well I take that back. I missed you."</p><p>Jenny still had David by the hand and she held on a little more tightly, showing no intention of letting go. "If ya missed me so much, then why don'tcha prove it? Go on and kiss me, like ya did a few days ago."</p><p>"You know that's not a good idea."</p><p>"Why are ya so uneasy about girls? We don't bite. Besides, it ain't like it's somethin' you've never done before, is it?"</p><p>David was trapped; Jenny held him by the hand, looking at him with nothing but temptation in her eyes, and David didn't know exactly how much he had missed her until she was standing right in front of him, unattainable but perfectly in reach all at once. "Well," said David, leaning in closer. "If that's what you want."</p><p>It wasn't mere curiosity that urged him to close the distance between them and kiss her again. This time it was remembrance of how that first time felt, and a strong desire to recreate those feelings as best as he could. Jenny kissed back with an expertise that made David strive to match her skills, and there they stood in the middle of her room, kissing harmlessly enough until Jenny steered David towards the bed and pulled him down on top of her. David, overcome with feelings he never knew he was capable of, didn't object.</p><p>"Davey," Jenny whispered between kisses. Her hands, placed upon his back, began to travel elsewhere and set off faint alarm bells in David's head.</p><p>He shouldn't be here, but it felt too good to leave. He whispered her name back to her and realized why Mush and Jack and the other newsies went off chasing girls, because <em>this</em> made life worth living.</p><p>Except the alarm bells grew louder when Jenny started to tug down David's suspenders, and he may not have had much experience with girls, but he knew that if Jenny pulled his suspenders down, things could turn dangerous.</p><p>"Wait," David gasped out, suddenly panicked. He rolled off of Jenny and lay beside her on the bed, heart racing as he tried to get his bearings. "We need to stop."</p><p>"What's the matter?" asked Jenny.</p><p>David sat up and ran a hand through his tousled hair, still feeling flushed from kissing Jenny. "I knew this was a bad idea. I should leave."</p><p>"Davey." Jenny reached for David's hand again, more gently than the first time. "I'm sorry. I was just doin' what I'm used to doin' every night and got a little carried away."</p><p>"You startled me."</p><p>Jenny cracked a smile. "You ain't like other boys. Usually it's the man who gets carried away. 'Course, I ain't like other girls, but I still wanna see you if ya don't mind. We'll go slow, okay?"</p><p>David felt frozen, as if Jenny's touch had turned him to stone, and his body wouldn't cooperate when he told it to move. "What do you mean?"</p><p>"You and me both know we can't be together, at least not like those nice couples ya see in Central Park, but we can still see each other, and we can still kiss without doing nothin' else if that's what you want. When we parted ways at that store I wanted to let ya go, but now I know I can't."</p><p>David knew what she meant, for he felt exactly the same way, and he found it increasingly harder to hold onto his morals each time he saw her. "And what made you realize that?" he asked.</p><p>Jenny sat up so she could look into his face, and she looked more serious than he had ever seen her before. The girl who tackled her struggles with coquettish banter and brutal honesty looked at David with a different light in her eyes, and that light tugged at his heart because for the first time he had known her, he felt like he was looking at the true Jenny that lived behind her various masks.</p><p>"You're good to me, David," said Jenny. "Real good to me, better than I deserve, and I can't let that go whether I deserve it or not. I like kissin' you 'cause I actually feel somethin' when I do it."</p><p>David didn't need further urging. He kissed Jenny again, lightly so he wouldn't lose control, and didn't care anymore if it was right or wrong.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Indulgence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jack had done a pretty good job of sticking to Sarah. For a whole week he had stayed away from the brothel and visited the Jacobs' apartment nearly every night, in spite of the unspoken tension between him and David. Except David seemed in a better mood lately, which was strange because he seemed awfully uptight about Jenny the other day, but Jack sure as hell wasn't complaining. If David wanted to be friendly then it only made life simpler for Jack, except for where Sarah was concerned.</p><p>Sticking to Sarah was pretty easy most of the time, except when it was afternoon and nobody else was in the apartment, leaving Jack and Sarah to see each other without worrying about the family watching them or interrupting. Jack liked being free to kiss Sarah as long as he liked, but it gradually became a problem when he sat on her bed with her, one hand on her waist, while she grabbed onto one of his suspenders as she kissed him back. And hell, that faint little noise she made each time Jack worked his lips a certain way <em>did</em> something to him that made it real hard to keep things chaste.</p><p>And taking things further was something Jack simply couldn't do.</p><p>"Say, I gotta get back to work," said Jack, pulling himself away from Sarah with difficulty. He wanted her something terrible, but he couldn't admit it, and for once he was grateful for the stack of papers that kept a hold on his life.</p><p>"So soon?" asked Sarah, looking puzzled.</p><p>"Yeah. News don't sell itself, ya know." Jack got off the bed and grabbed his papers, trying not to look at Sarah as he did so. If he let himself gaze at her, he might not leave the room, and Jack did have <em>some</em> sense of right and wrong even if he didn't think about it much.</p><p>He left the Jacobs' apartment and stepped out onto the busy streets, but he couldn't sell his papers. An uncontrollable fire had been lit inside him, a fire that consumed his every thought and action, and the only way he could put it out was to seek solace in someone he knew he would encounter again, sooner or later. It was like Jenny had control of one of those lassos the cowboys out west used. She had that lasso wrapped around Jack's neck loosely enough so he could breathe and walk around and do as he pleased, but it didn't change the fact that she had a hold on him, and he could try to escape her but the lasso wouldn't let him. He would get tugged back to Jenny no matter what, and when the urge took hold of him he couldn't ignore it.</p><p>Mrs. Johnson's house looked the same as ever, plain on the outside but tempting within, and Jack headed right up to Jenny's room so he could knock on her door just like he did the last time he saw her. There was no answer, so he knocked again, and at last he turned the doorknob to see if it was unlocked. The door gave way and Jack peeked inside, but he saw nothing but the neatly made bed, the dresser, and the window with the curtains drawn over it.</p><p>It figured that Jenny wasn't home when Jack needed her. He would have to go back onto the streets and forget about that fire, which wouldn't be easy when it had been days since he last had a girl to relieve him. Sighing, Jack turned away from Jenny's room and found himself face-to-face with a dark-haired girl who looked familiar, though he couldn't place her name.</p><p>"Hello there, cowboy," said the girl. "What brings ya here at this hour?"</p><p>"Nothin'," said Jack. "I'm on my way out."</p><p>"Well it can't be nothin', or else you wouldn't be here. What do ya want with Jenny?"</p><p>"Who says I'm here to see Jenny, huh?"</p><p>The girl smiled, and suddenly Jack remembered her as the whore who approached him the second time he came to the brothel. "There's quite a bit of talk 'round here concernin' you and Jenny. She's been actin' real suspicious lately and I think <em>you</em> got somethin' to do with it."</p><p>"You got the wrong fella, dollface," said Jack. "I ain't seen Jenny in a week, and that's the truth."</p><p>"It ain't dollface," she said. "It's Kitty, and I wanna know what kinda game you think you're playin' with Jenny. We're real close, ya know, like sisters, and I'd hate to see any fella, 'specially one like you, try and break her heart with this game of yours."</p><p>"You oughtta be a newsie," said Jack. " 'Cause you obviously got a real gift for makin' things up."</p><p>"Do I?" said Kitty. "Well lemme tell ya somethin', cowboy. You might think you can see Jenny whenever ya please and pretend you and her can be happy together, but she's a whore, same as me, and your little dalliance with her ain't gonna change that."</p><p>Jack was amused at how Kitty had the wrong idea, though he wondered how she had arrived at this idea in the first place. If anybody was capable of having a "dalliance" with Jenny, it was David, but as far as Jack knew nothing had happened between David and Jenny. He smirked at Kitty, just to show her that her words didn't scare him, and took a step closer so he could place a hand under her chin and tilt her face up towards his own. "Look, sweetheart, if I say you got the wrong idea, then you got the wrong idea. Sure, I like beddin' Jenny as much as the next fella does, but that's all it is, and if you don't believe me than it's too bad for you."</p><p>"Well I'm glad to hear that," said Kitty. " 'Cause I would just hate for poor little Jenny to get involved in somethin' that would hurt her."</p><p>"Well whatever rumors you mighta heard abour poor little Jenny ain't true. So how 'bout you and me forget this conversation ever happened, all right?" Jack moved past Kitty until he was out of the hall and down the stairs, figuring he could always come back later that night if he wanted Jenny to fix his problem. Kitty was a real pretty dame, one of the prettiest he had ever met, but he could tell she was as mean as the Delancey brothers under all that beauty, and Jack didn't take up with girls who were mean. Let some other poor sucker have her.</p><p>No, the only girl in that joint who could relieve Jack was Jenny, and he would just have to wait for her.</p><hr/><p>"What are you thinking about?" asked David.</p><p>"How do ya know I'm thinkin'?" said Jenny.</p><p>"I've gotten really good at reading your face, that's how."</p><p>They were in a shady corner of Central Park, seated at the base of the largest tree in the vicinity, and Jenny felt strange because she was actually <em>happy</em>. She didn't spend her days feeling thoroughly miserable, of course, but true happiness was an elusive thing for a girl who spent her life catering to the satisfaction of others. "I'm thinkin' of how good it feels to have somethin' nobody knows about," she said.</p><p>"You don't feel guilty about keeping secrets?" David asked, his brow furrowed with concern.</p><p>Jenny laughed. "Secrets are <em>fun</em>. 'Course I ain't guilty."</p><p>They were both playing with fire, sneaking away to meet each other just long enough to talk a few minutes or steal a couple of kisses, but that was just part of the thrill. Jenny never would have guessed that the uprightly moral boy who caught her stealing would have had it in him, and she was glad that he did. She would enjoy David for as long as she could, for as long as it lasted, which wasn't bound to be long considering the sorts of lives they both lived.</p><p>She and David were really careful each time they saw one another, just in case they ran into any newsies who might start the wheels of gossip in motion. They avoided Tibby's restaurant like it had the plague and established specific times and places to meet each other, so they didn't have to seek each other out at the brothel or David's apartment. None of the other girls had seen David and Jenny intended to keep it that way.</p><p>"I have to go," David said as the afternoon sun shifted up above. "We've sat here long enough already and I have to finish selling."</p><p>"Oh, they're just papers," said Jenny.</p><p>"Papers that help my family eat."</p><p>"Can't ya stay for just a few more minutes?"</p><p>"And then a few minutes will turn into an hour, and both of us will be sorry, Jenny. I'll see you again tomorrow, all right?"</p><p>Jenny couldn't argue and watched David gather up the papers sitting in a stack upon the grass. He kissed her goodbye, pulled on his cap, and headed off through the park, calling out headlines as he went. Jenny remained beneath the tree and watched him until his figure was too small to make out anymore, wondering what would happen if Mrs. Johnson ever found out how she was spending her free time. She found it funny that most of the girls thought she was involved with Jack, and she did nothing to discourage these rumors because it was better than letting them find out about David. Kitty in particular was suspicious of her doings, and Gina had a grudge against her for stealing upstairs with Spot Conlon.</p><p>If David paid her to spend time with him there wouldn't be a problem, since money was everything in the brothel and without it, Jenny was no good to Mrs. Johnson at all.</p><p>She was nothing more than a pawn in a business she couldn't escape.</p><hr/><p>Jack rolled off of Jenny and lit his usual cigarette, feeling her blue eyes on him as he lit the tobacco. "Ya miss me at all?" he asked, sending her a lazy grin. "Afraid I'd stay away from ya for good?"</p><p>Jenny lay on her side, the blanket pulled up to her chin, and her eyes followed the puff of smoke that floated up towards the ceiling. "Couldn't believe my eyes when you showed up at my door," she said. "We're givin' everyone the wrong idea, ya know."</p><p>"Oh yeah? How's that?"</p><p>"The girls 'round here think you ain't just a john. If <em>I</em> was you, I wouldn't come within ten feet of this place."</p><p>"Eh, let 'em talk. You and me both know it ain't true."</p><p>Jack was so accustomed to lies that a couple of false stories about him here and there didn't faze him in the slightest, as long as he didn't get landed in the Refuge because of them. The girls in the brothel probably got bored during the day anyway, just like the newsies got bored when the headlines were lousy, and spinning tales about people they hardly knew was just a way of passing the time. The only thing that bothered Jack was the question of <em>why</em> exactly these girls decided to single him out, especially when he hadn't showed his face in over a week.</p><p>"Let 'em talk?" Jenny echoed, continuing to watch him. "You really want people to think you're courtin' a hooker?"</p><p>"No, 'cause I <em>ain't</em> courtin' a hooker. Where are the girls gettin' these ideas from anyway?"</p><p>Jenny, who usually had an answer for everything, remained silent.</p><p>"You're sneakin' out all the time," Jack pressed. "And it certainly ain't to see me, so it must be some other guy. You still seein' Davey?"</p><p>"What do <em>you</em> care?" asked Jenny.</p><p>"Who says I care? I'm just askin' a question."</p><p>"Well ya seem to ask an awful lotta questions about him. Jealous, maybe?"</p><p>Jack put his cigarette out on the bedpost and flicked the butt towards the floor, hoping it would fall into one of the cracks in the boards. It missed, and he grudgingly turned his attention back to Jenny, who looked a lot more wide-awake than she did five minutes ago. "I ain't jealous," he said. "I just wanna know why people 'round here think that <em>I'm</em> your fella."</p><p>"One of the girls saw you talkin' to me on the street," Jenny admitted. "And I s'pose once the others learned of it, they understood it all wrong."</p><p>"And is that how Davey found out you talked to me? Did ya tell him?"</p><p>Jenny looked genuinely surprised. "I never told him nothin' about us. I would never."</p><p>Jack was tired of hearing about David. In fact, he wished he had never brought David's name up in the first place, and he slid back under the covers so he could climb back on top of Jenny. "Ya know what?" he said in her ear. "It don't matter. It's just you and me right now, and I'm gettin' my money's worth."</p><p>"Well, it ain't like I got a choice," said Jenny, smirking up at him.</p><p>Her usual fire had returned, much to Jack's relief, and he erased all thoughts of David from his mind as he lost himself to pleasure. He didn't care if people thought he was seeing Jenny, he didn't care if Jenny was still seeing David, and he certainly didn't care if anyone had their facts wrong because they got him and David mixed up with each other. A distant part of him <em>did</em> care about Sarah, but he silenced that part of his mind with the reminder that Sarah could only find out if she started chatting with Mrs. Johnson's whores, which would never happen in a million years.</p><p>Except information had an uncanny way of spreading like wildfire for such a big city, but Jack wouldn't worry about that for now. He rolled off of Jenny a second time, thinking of nothing but the scent of her hair and the softness of her skin, and refrained from lighting up another cigarette. At the rate he was going, he would run out of smokes by the end of the week. "Say, lemme stay the night," he said, making himself comfortable on the mattress. It may have been a bit stiff, but it wasn't nearly as lumpy as the mattresses in the lodging house.</p><p>"And why should I do that?" asked Jenny.</p><p>" 'Cause I'm tired and ain't in the mood for gettin' up, that's why. And maybe 'cause ya like my company."</p><p>"Is that so? And are ya willin' to pay a little extra for spendin' the night in my bed?"</p><p>"How 'bout a discount?" Jack asked. "I'll tell ya all about the strike, or Santa Fe, or whatever ya wanna hear. Ain't that better than a few extra pennies?"</p><p>Jenny remained where she was, her loosened hair spread across her pillow, and she reached under the blanket to take Jack's hand. "I'll give ya a discount 'cause I like you, Jack. You may be just a john, but I like you all the same."</p><p>That was reason enough for Jack, and he didn't bother worrying about what the other newsies would say when they found his empty bed in the morning. None of that mattered at the moment; Jack just wanted an escape from the world and all its burdens, and spending the night with Jenny was the best escape he could ask for.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Truth</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>David rose early and ate a quick breakfast, his mind constantly on the clock that ticked upon the family's mantlepiece. Les had become so used to David rejecting his offers of selling together that he didn't bother asking, and Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs both assumed that David got ready in haste because of work. Which was partially true, and David reminded himself that they would only worry about him if they discovered his acquaintance with Jenny. What decent parents would want their son seeing a girl who sold herself, after all? David pulled on his cap and jacket, then proceeded to lace up his boots, when a voice said his name.</p><p>"David?"</p><p>David looked up from his boots to find Sarah standing nearby, looking apologetic. "I don't mean to delay you," Sarah said quickly. "I just wanted to ask you, is everything all right with Jack?"</p><p>"I've never known Jack to be anything other than all right," said David.</p><p>"Well he's been very attentive for the last several days, coming to see me and taking me out, you know. But yesterday he said he couldn't see me later that night, and he wouldn't explain why. Does that sound strange to you?"</p><p>"No, it sounds like Jack."</p><p>"What is that supposed to mean?"</p><p>David finished lacing up his boots and chose his words carefully. "It means that Jack doesn't feel the need to explain himself the way most people do." It also meant that Jack kept the truth to himself, whether it was right or wrong, but David couldn't tell that to Sarah. She admired Jack too much to see past his charming exterior and into the carefree liar within.</p><p>"So you think everything is all right?" asked Sarah.</p><p>"Try talking to him again," said David. "Maybe he'll take you out tonight, or come eat with the family. Now I've got to go."</p><p>He left the apartment and couldn't bring himself to worry about Jack the way Sarah clearly did. He hadn't forgotten what Spot had told him about Jack talking to Jenny, and he hadn't forgotten how Jack had lied to him when questioned about it, but those memories were at the back of David's mind and no longer bothered him. He had more important things to worry about, like his increasingly complicated relationship with Jenny, which he only kept secret out of necessity. David was too practical to pretend that he and Jenny could properly be together, and he knew the day would come when he would have to decide what he should do about her, but he wasn't ready to make that decision. For the time being David just wanted to see her whenever he could, even if it was only for a few minutes at a time, and he wanted to make her feel like she deserved better than the life she lived.</p><p>The distribution center wouldn't open for another forty-five minutes, giving David enough time to meet Jenny before he had to start selling. They had already agreed to meet at one of their usual spots, about a block away from Mrs. Johnson's house, and David headed in that direction knowing it was too early for any of his fellow newsies to run into him. It was funny how not long ago, before the strike, David would have been horrified at the very thought of a girl like Jenny, and now he woke up every morning eager to see her.</p><p>He supposed his morals weren't so rigid after all, and it didn't worry him as much as it used to. Every time he was with Jenny he was happy, and most importantly <em>Jenny</em> was happy as well. It took David this long to realize that buying her breakfast was one of the best things he had ever done.</p><p>Jenny hadn't arrived yet when David reached their meeting spot and he stood on the street corner, eyes open and alert for a glimpse of her face. He still felt awkward in situations like these, though he had become significantly less awkward when it came to kissing girls, thanks to the practice he had gotten over the last several days.</p><p>The minutes ticked by and David waited for the familiar sight of Jenny's blonde hair, but she didn't appear. It was strange; she was usually on time like clockwork and had seemed perfectly willing to meet him when they made the arrangements. The minutes wore on, and David began to feel rather foolish standing around waiting for a girl who clearly wasn't going to show up, when he should have been heading to the distribution center instead.</p><p>But if Jenny was sick or something had happened to her, he ought to find her, shouldn't he?</p><p>David hesitated for a few moments longer, then sighed and headed to Mrs. Johnson's house. If he was lucky he would run into Jenny on the way there, and if he was unlucky, well... David wasn't going to think about those possibilities. He didn't believe in luck anyway.</p><p>He couldn't help but glance into the alleys he passed by, just in case Jenny had gotten mixed up in one of those horrible stories David read about in the papers he sold. He was filled with overwhelming relief each time he saw only stray dogs and homeless people, for reading about horror stories was nothing like actually <em>seeing</em> them. David wasn't like some of the other fellows he knew. He wasn't a street boy with experience in handling serious danger, and he walked a bit faster as he drew closer to Mrs. Johnson's house. Perhaps Jenny had merely overslept and forgot that she was supposed to meet him that morning.</p><p>He slipped through the front door of the house as quietly as possible and made his way towards the staircase. He thought he saw a girl heading into the parlor and figured she was probably a servant, or at least he hoped that was the case, and walked up the stairs towards Jenny's room. It was risky of him to visit her like this, but he had to make sure that Jenny was all right and knocked softly upon her door so he wouldn't alert the other girls.</p><p>No answer. David knocked again, a little harder this time.</p><p>Still no answer.</p><p>David figured that it couldn't hurt to peek into her room really quick, just to make sure that nothing was wrong, and he gently pushed the door open. The room was so small that he immediately spotted the figure upon the bed, apparently asleep beneath the blankets, and he was about to retreat and let Jenny have her rest when he noticed something else.</p><p>A cowboy hat lay upon the floor, just a couple of feet from the bed.</p><p>A cowboy hat and a red bandana, the same hat and bandana David saw every single day upon the person of Jack Kelly.</p><p>David felt suddenly lightheaded and at first he couldn't move, frozen stiff by the dread that crept into his heart, but at last he entered the room and shut the door behind him. It was sick curiosity that drove him to walk across the tiny room, stepping around the telltale hat and bandana until he had reached the side of the bed, and his fears were confirmed when he saw Jack sleeping on Jenny's sheets, his head buried in Jenny's pillow. All the lies that David had decided to overlook came to the forefront of his mind and he stared down at Jack, knowing that his friend had betrayed him again.</p><p>"So you don't know Jenny," David said, loud enough to wake Jack. "Nothing's happened between you two. Of course."</p><p>Jack opened his eyes and looked groggily up at David. "Wha— Davey? Wha's happenin'?"</p><p>"Why did you keep lying to me, Jack? How long has this been going on?"</p><p>Jack groaned and rubbed at his eyes, clearly not a morning person, and David hated the sight of him in Jenny's bed more than he had ever hated anything before. That time during the strike, when Jack appeared all dressed up in that nice suit Pulitzer gave him, was nothing compared to the sight in front of David's eyes.</p><p>"What are you doin' here?" Jack murmured. "Where the hell am I— Oh." He finally took in his surroundings and sat up in bed, keeping the blankets clutched to his chest, and shook off his remaining drowsiness. "Davey, if you're gonna interrogate a fella, at least let him get dressed first, will ya?"</p><p>"You're making jokes at a time like this?" David demanded. "You've been lying to me all this time. All those times you kept asking about Jenny, you just wanted to cover up for what you've been doing, haven't you? And what about Sarah? What about my <em>sister</em>, Jack? I bet you never considered how I would feel, or how Sarah would feel, or even how Jenny would feel about your selfishness. You don't care about anyone or anything but yourself, do you?"</p><p>David couldn't stop. Once he started talking, the words came pouring out in an angry torrent and Jack just watched him from the bed, his face unreadable as he listened to David list all of his sins.</p><p>"Yeah, you're right," said Jack. "And I ain't got an excuse for what I did, but I did it all the same. There ain't no goin' back."</p><p>"How could you do this to Sarah?" David asked. "I should have never let you have anything to do with her. I should have <em>known</em> you would be trouble."</p><p>"You ain't much of a saint yourself," Jack shot back. "You're always walkin' around, actin' like you're so perfect and pure, but here you are in a brothel, Davey. Ya <em>do</em> know what a brothel is, don'tcha?"</p><p>"Yeah, I know what it is. And Jenny deserves better than people like you coming in and using her."</p><p>"Why don'tcha wake up already? Jenny ain't your girl and she ain't never gonna be your girl, no matter how nice you is to her. She's a whore."</p><p>"She's just doing what she has to do to survive, Jack."</p><p>"Yeah, and she kept secrets from ya in order to do that."</p><p>For the first time since the strike, David had a strong urge to lose control and hit Jack. He wanted to drive his fist right into Jack's lying, carefree, treacherous face, just to show him that he wouldn't stand by and tolerate his behavior. "That doesn't matter," he said, forcing himself to have control. "Why did it have to be <em>her</em>, Jack? Out of all the girls in this city, why did you go to Jenny?"</p><p>"What, are ya jealous or somethin'?" asked Jack. "Why don'tcha ask that to all the other fellas who've paid Jenny to be with 'em? You're real smart, Davey, and a smart guy like you oughtta know better than to get too attached to a girl like her anyway."</p><p>"I never said I was attached," said David.</p><p>"Yeah, but it's written all over your face. Stop the presses, everybody; David Jacobs has fallen for a whore!"</p><p>David nearly did hit him, but he was stopped when the door opened up and Jenny herself appeared, her hair wet from the bath. "What's all this— David?" She took in the sight of Jack sitting up in bed with David standing before him, wearing a scowl, and for the first time since David had known her she looked completely lost.</p><p>"I waited for you," said David. He felt a strange sadness settle over him, taking the place of his anger.</p><p>"Well I'm here now," said Jenny. "This ain't the way I wanted to meet, but—"</p><p>"I don't want to talk to you anymore," David cut in. "I'm off to work."</p><p>"Oh, Davey, don't be like that," Jenny pleaded as David headed for the door. "You <em>know</em> what I do for a livin'."</p><p>"Yeah, but you never told me you were spending your nights with <em>him</em>." David pointed at Jack, who remained silent during their exchange, probably too groggy to contribute.</p><p>"Well ya never asked," said Jenny. "And I never bothered mentioning him 'cause Jack don't mean nothin' to me, Davey! Can't we forget about this and carry on like usual?"</p><p>"I'm not in the mood."</p><p>David moved past Jenny and strode out into the hall, not even caring that a girl from two doors over could see him. If the whole entire brothel saw him he wouldn't care, he was in such a state, and David was glad to get outside and away from the house's poisonous atmosphere. It was true that he had never asked Jenny a single question about Jack, but he didn't think he needed to and never imagined that he would walk into her room and find Jack sleeping in her bed.</p><p>He hated being kept in the dark when it came to the truth. He hated it when Jack lied to him about who he was, he hated it when Jack lied to him about Jenny, and he hated the fact that Jack was exactly right. He <em>was</em> attached to Jenny and he tried his best to ignore her profession, but it was suddenly right in his face and the sight of Jack was a wake-up call. He should have never allowed himself to get involved with Jenny in the first place.</p><p>Perhaps if he walked extra fast, he could still make it to the distribution center before they ran out of papers. David wanted nothing more than to work himself for hours on end, in hopes of forgetting everything that had happened that morning.</p><p>And if he never saw Jack or Jenny again, then that would be just fine.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Regret</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jenny's first instinct was to rush out into the hall and try to chase down David, who had stormed out before she got a chance to talk with him, but the moment she stepped out of her room she found herself face-to-face with Kitty. Out of all the girls for her to run into at a time like this, Kitty was the absolute last girl she wanted to see, and Jenny quickly shut the door behind her so Kitty wouldn't see Jack in her bed.</p><p>"Who was that boy?" asked Kitty, eying Jenny with a smile on her lips. "The one with the curly hair."</p><p>"Oh, him?" said Jenny. "Just a john who thought I was chargin' him too much money. I straightened him out and sent him packing."</p><p>"He seemed awful unhappy. What's his name?"</p><p>"What's it matter?"</p><p>Kitty gave Jenny an indulgent smile, as if the two of them were dear friends. "Well if he don't want to see you no more, he might wanna get his money's worth elsewhere. We don't wanna deprive the poor fella of good business, do we?"</p><p>"You don't want him," said Jenny. "That fella's nothin' but trouble."</p><p>"Or maybe you're just bein' picky with your customers," said Kitty, still using her false tone of friendship. "Maybe ya think you're too good for the life now that you got a fella on the side, is that right? Maybe you're thinking about bustin' outta here and runnin' off into the sunset with your cowboy, happily ever after."</p><p>"He ain't my cowboy. Mind your own business, Kitty."</p><p>"If he ain't your cowboy, then what is he? You're awful secretive, Jenny, and I'm just tryin' to help."</p><p>"Well I don't need help. Not from you or nobody else." Jenny retreated back into her room, vanishing behind her door so fast it was like she had never left, and found Jack sitting up in bed rubbing the sleep from his eyes. She didn't like Jack the same way she liked David, but she had always liked him all the same, and now the sight of him sitting in her bed felt like a knife in her heart. If Jack hadn't insisted on spending the night, none of this would have happened, and Jenny could be spending her morning in David's company instead, the same as always. Better yet, if Jack hadn't come to see her in the first place, but stayed at home in his own bed where he belonged, then—</p><p>But no. This wasn't Jack's fault at all, really. It was <em>Jenny</em> who had accepted him as a customer last night, it was Jenny who let him stay until morning, and it was Jenny who was foolish enough to get caught up in the likes of David Jacobs. It was Jenny who became a whore in the first place, thus robbing herself of the chance to have normal relationships with normal boys, and she was suffering the consequences at last.</p><p>"You ain't in love with him, are ya?" Jack asked sleepily.</p><p>"In love with who?" asked Jenny, longing to roll him out of her bed and push him out the window.</p><p>"Davey, of course. You in love with him?"</p><p>"He's good to me."</p><p>Jack ran a lazy hand through his messy hair. "So's the customers who buy my papes, but that don't mean I love 'em."</p><p>"No, I don't love David," said Jenny. "A girl like me don't know how."</p><p>And she knew it was the truth, despite all the good David had done her since the day they met. She didn't know how to love when she was just a little girl living in a crowded tenement, watching her parents throw things at each other, she didn't know how to love when she first became a whore, learning to sell pleasure to whoever would buy it, and she still didn't know how to love, even after meeting a boy who was good and wanted to help her. She had only succeeded in hurting David after he gave her glimpses of another life she would never have.</p><p>Jack yawned and dragged himself out of bed, then staggered over to his fallen clothes while Jenny stood by and tried not to feel anything. This was what she got for trying to live a double life, for trying to be a normal girl and keep her profession at the same time, and she got what she deserved. They <em>all</em> got what they deserved for meddling in each other's lives.</p><p>"I gotta tell ya somethin'," Jack said as he pulled up his suspenders.</p><p>"What is it?" asked Jenny.</p><p>"I've been seein' a girl this whole time. Been seein' her for months."</p><p>"Is that supposed to bother me or somethin'? I got a fella the other night who's been married for twelve years and swears he loves his wife. You could do a lot worse, Jack."</p><p>Jack grabbed his red bandana and tied it around his neck. Red, the color of sin. "Yeah, but this girl is Davey's sister."</p><p>"Oh."</p><p>"Name's Sarah. She's as good as David, even better, and I don't deserve her."</p><p>David had told Jenny about Sarah, but he had never mentioned that she was seeing Jack. He never talked much about Jack, now that Jenny thought of it.</p><p>"You wanna know somethin' else?" Jack asked as he grabbed his cowboy hat. "You wanna know why me and you keep seein' each other?"</p><p>"For a good time?"</p><p>"Yeah, sure, it's for a good time, but it's also 'cause we know they're too good for us. David and Sarah. They're both too good for the likes of us, and both of us know it."</p><p>Jenny didn't know what to say.</p><p>Jack stood close to her, cowboy hat clutched in one hand, and looked down at her through eyes that were still a bit groggy. "David and Sarah belong to one world and we belong to another. They're the saints and we're the sinners." He leaned down and kissed her just once upon the forehead. "Ain't that right?"</p><p>"You're right," said Jenny. "You've always been right. Now you better escape out the window or else Kitty will get suspicious."</p><p>"I ain't afraid of no broad like her."</p><p>"I don't care if you're afraid or not. I got a job I've gotta keep."</p><p>Jack climbed out the window and onto the street below, managing to escape without hurting himself in his groggy state, and Jenny watched him leave with a slightly lighter heart. If Jack knew what was good for him, he would stay with that Sarah girl and keep a safe distance away from the brothel. His money wasn't worth the trouble he caused.</p><hr/><p>David arrived at the distribution center just in time to pay for his newspapers, though most of the newsies had already started selling by the time he got there. Some of them, like Race, loitered in the street and searched through the papers, looking for a good story, and David followed Race's example. It gave him something to think about besides Jenny.</p><p>"Say, Davey, you seen Jack anywhere?" Race asked.</p><p>David hated to lie, but the word "No" passed through his lips before he could stop it. "Haven't seen him at all," he added, increasing the lie. "Why do you ask?"</p><p>"Well he wasn't in his bed this mornin'."</p><p>"Probably 'cause he was in someone else's bed," said Blink, grinning at Race. "Where else would he be?"</p><p>"Yeah, you're right, Blink," said Race. "But the real question is <em>whose </em>bed it was."</p><p>David felt numb and tried to focus on the front headline of the papers he carried, though he ended up reading the same couple of words over and over. The letters blurred in front of his eyes and he tried to ignore the crude jokes and speculations on where Jack had been last night, and who exactly he had spent the night with. Race, Blink, and the other newsies spoke so casually about all the girls Jack might have been with, while Sarah, David's sister, was at home thinking that all was right in the world. David could hardly stand it.</p><p>"Hey, Race," he said, looking up from his paper. His voice came out harsher than he meant it to.</p><p>"Yeah?" said Race.</p><p>"Still taking bets about my private affairs?"</p><p>"Nah, that got boring after a while. Besides, it kept me away from the races and I'm hopin' to win big at Sheepshead today."</p><p>David didn't care if Race won big or not. He didn't care about anything except for the numbness that turned into a smoldering sort of anger as he walked through the streets in search of a selling spot. As this smoldering, burning feeling increased, he realized that he was no longer upset with Jack or Jenny for what they had done. He was angry with himself. He was angry for Sarah's sake. He and Sarah had placed their affections in entirely the wrong place, with two people who had lost all respectability long ago, and they would pay for their folly.</p><p>What killed David inside was that he <em>knew</em> better, but he got involved anyway. He knew that every decision he had made was a bad one, yet he couldn't stop himself from making mistake after mistake until his good intentions turned into a complete loss of reason.</p><p>And people said he was smart.</p><p>If he was so intelligent, then why did he allow himself to get into this mess? So far the only smart thing David had done was get away from the brothel as fast as he could, away from Jenny and her uncanny ability to lure him into bad decisions. She and Jack belonged with each other.</p><p>David found a street corner to sell on and frowned at the thought of Jack. Their friendship had been strained now and then due to Jack's habit of improving the truth, but David had always considered him a good friend and a loyal companion out on the streets. Now their friendship had been ripped apart, perhaps forever, and it was all because neither of them could resist a blonde prostitute who was only trying to survive in the world.</p><p>A well-dressed man approached the street corner, accompanied by a golden-haired girl in a frilly, high-necked dress with a flowery hat to match. The type of girl that Jenny could have been if she had been born to different parents in a different part of society. The type of girl that Jenny would never be, no matter how much David wanted to help her.</p><p>The man checked his pocket watch, stopped in front of David, and cast bored eyes over the morning edition clutched in David's hands. "I'd like one paper please," he said, perfectly indifferent.</p><p>David handed him a paper and accepted a penny in return. "Thank you, sir."</p><p>The man tucked the paper under his arm and walked away, the girl trailing after him. She didn't even spare a glance at David.</p><hr/><p>Jack could have sworn he heard church bells ringing somewhere, but maybe it was all in his head. He still felt half-asleep after the rude awakening he had gotten from David, though he supposed he deserved to lose out on his sleep. Hell, he would have deserved it if David had lost control and punched him in the face. Perhaps he <em>should</em> have punched Jack in the face, just to teach him a lesson for all the wrongs he had done Sarah. Plus it would have woken him up more thoroughly than a bucket of cold water would have.</p><p><em>Ding, ding</em>.</p><p>He could still hear the church bells, just like the first night he slept with Jenny. Jack trudged down the streets, his cowboy hat pulled low on his forehead, and he figured he would go to the lodging house and tell Kloppman he was sick. There was no way he could sell papers that morning.</p><p>
  <em>Ding, ding, ding. </em>
</p><p>Were those damn bells in his head real or imaginary? Did it even matter? He felt guilty either way and wanted to kick himself for his weakness. Jack Kelly rarely regretted anything, but he was starting to feel the worst regret of his life, even worse than lying to David about his family during the strike.</p><p>Jack already lost his family once and now he had probably lost it again. He never realized just how much David and Sarah had become his new family until David discovered him in Jenny's room and looked at him with such contempt, such a complete sense of betrayal, that Jack was surprised he didn't burn to a crisp from the power of David's glares.</p><p>Every time Jack thought his life would work out, he did something stupid and ruined everything. He was his good-for-nothing father all over again.</p><p>He supposed his biggest problem was that he thought he could get away with it. He thought he could get away with anything, just as long as he kept his charm and his wits about him, but he always ended up getting caught in the end. He would be lucky if David and Sarah ever spoke to him again after his selfish behavior.</p><p>Jack headed in the direction of Duane Street, toward the lodging house, but a building caught his eye. He recognized the steeple and long windows of a church and found himself approaching the front doors, though he hadn't set foot inside a church since he was a kid. The building drew him inside and he stepped through the open doors, feeling dwarfed by the high ceiling and pillars that seemed to reach the sky. He quickly removed his cowboy hat, remembering at the last minute, and held it in one hand as he crossed the spotless floor.</p><p>He knew what he had to do.</p><p>When Jack walked into a building, or strolled down the street, or climbed up a fire escape, he moved with confidence. He moved like he could own the world if the world gave him half a chance. Jack strode through life with his head held high, no matter what life threw at him, but as he walked through the church and headed to the confession booth, all of his confidence and charm abandoned him. He bowed his head and walked slowly, as if punishment awaited him in the booth, and when he slid into the cushioned seat he stayed silent for a minute, staring down at his hands.</p><p>It was Sarah's face that entered his head, dancing in front of his eyes as he sat in the confession booth. Sarah's face, not Jenny's, and he knew what he had to say.</p><p>"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned..."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Surrender</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>David arrived home and found Sarah in her usual chair, staring down at her sewing with empty eyes. This was the third day in a row David had found her like this, ever since Jack told Sarah about Jenny and said he didn't deserve to see her anymore. David had never seen his sister so upset, though once her anger had faded she became a shadow of herself, unable to smile or frown or do much of anything. David would rather see her demolish the apartment then sit around like a ghost, unable to deal with the aftermath.</p><p>He hung up his cap and approached Sarah's chair, wishing she would greet him like she normally did. "I can punch him in the face if you want," said David. "We both know he deserves it."</p><p>Sarah looked up from her sewing and shook her head. "Punching Jack won't change anything, David."</p><p>"I know. But it would sure feel good."</p><p>"I should have known it wouldn't last," said Sarah. "You can't expect an exciting boy like Jack to stay with a boring girl like me."</p><p>"Sarah, don't say that."</p><p>"Why not? You know it's true."</p><p>David fell silent. Jack was avoiding all members of the Jacobs family since he broke the news to Sarah, but it didn't stop David from wanting to find him and make him feel every bit of pain that Sarah felt. Jack had done more than sleep with a prostitute and betray his girl. He had destroyed his ties with the Jacobs', who had become a second family to him, and spent his days selling alone and sneaking through New York, doing all he could to stay away from David.</p><p>If it was anyone else, David would have labeled him a coward, but he knew that Jack wasn't cowardly. Jack was simply a self-preservationist.</p><p>"Mama is taking me out soon," said Sarah, gazing vaguely at her lap. "Says I need some fresh air to take my mind off everything. We're bringing Les along."</p><p>"Where is he?" asked David.</p><p>"Playing up on the rooftop. He doesn't understand what's going on."</p><p>"Which makes him luckier than the rest of us," David murmured under his breath.</p><p>But Les would probably understand soon enough. He idolized Jack and had already started to ask why Jack hadn't come around lately. David didn't want to admit it, but he <em>did</em> miss Jack's presence in the Jacobs home and missed selling with him even more. He sold the morning edition with Mush instead, which wasn't so bad, but Mush didn't have the charisma and persuasion that brought dozens of pennies into Jack's hands every day.</p><p>David left Sarah to her listless sewing and opened one of his old books, savoring the words on the page. He no longer attended school in favor of selling papers, but he still loved to read and strove to improve his mind in spite of his long hours at work. His mother soon collected Les and Sarah, then left to take them to a row of shops that Sarah loved to look at, in the hope that she would cheer up, and David found himself alone with his books. His father wouldn't come home from work for another couple of hours.</p><p>A knock on the door pulled him from his reading and he jumped in his seat, startled at the sudden noise. Hastily setting his book down, he approached the front door and turned the knob, tense and alert.</p><p>"Davey," said his visitor, looking at him with guilty eyes. "I've been meanin' to talk to you."</p><p>"What are <em>you</em> doing here?" demanded David. "How do you know where I live?"</p><p>"I've been askin' around," said Jenny. She wore plainer clothes than usual and had her hair pinned up under a bonnet. "I can't stop thinkin' about that terrible morning, Davey. I never got a chance to apologize and it's killin' me inside. Mrs. Johnson's afraid I'm gettin' sick and is stricter with me than ever."</p><p>"You shouldn't be here," David said weakly. He had tried so hard to forget her, but now that she was in front of him he realized how much he had longed for her.</p><p>"I know I shouldn't be here, but I had to see you one last time. Won't ya let me in, just for a few minutes?"</p><p>David moved aside, against his better judgment, and allowed Jenny to enter his home. She seemed unusually nervous as she stood in the shabby apartment, no doubt feeling out of place the same way Jack always did when he came to visit, and David let all of his parents' teachings dictate his first move: he offered to take her hat.</p><p>Jenny handed over her bonnet, a strange, shy little smile on her lips, and gazed about the room. "Did you grow up here?" she asked.</p><p>"It's been home my whole life," said David.</p><p>"I think it's lovely."</p><p>"Now you're just trying to flatter me."</p><p>"I ain't lying," said Jenny. "You're real lucky to have a nice home like this and a family that cares about you. Not all of us are lucky enough to come from such a good place."</p><p>David wished she had never come, and yet he still had feelings for her. Something in Jenny's face and voice touched him to the core, making him forgive her before an apology even passed her lips, and he knew that they would both hurt themselves if they continued to see each other.</p><p>He wouldn't, <em>couldn't</em> see her again, but that didn't mean he couldn't say goodbye. He stood close to Jenny and took her by the hand. "You don't have to be sorry, Jenny. Not about Jack or anything else."</p><p>"But I <em>am</em> sorry. I know we can't see each other no more, but I couldn't let ya walk away feelin' angry and hurt. I had to make sure you're all right."</p><p>"I'm not angry anymore," said David, feeling a flame of something else, something completely different from anger, smolder inside him as he looked into her face. "And I usually don't swear, but I want to give you one hell of a goodbye." He pulled her against him and kissed her, knowing it would be the last time he ever touched her lips. Jenny hesitated at first, surprised by his actions, but soon she responded and deepened the kiss, clinging to him with a desperation David had never seen before.</p><p>"I wish I could love you," Jenny whispered.</p><p>David kept on kissing her, wanting to take that sad desperation and lock it away someplace where it would never find Jenny again. When she reached for his suspenders, he didn't try to stop her, and she didn't protest when he started to fumble at her dress. He hardly realized what was happening when they ended up on his bed, but he was too far gone to remember morals or chastity or anything else his parents had taught him. Jenny needed him in that moment and he was willing to give her everything.</p><p>He lay beside her when it was all over, listening to her breathe right next to his ear, and wondered if he was as bad as Jack. He acted so self-righteous all the time, like he was so much better than everyone else, when he was really no different from Jack or any other boy on the streets.</p><p>Perhaps he had wanted this all along and didn't know it, but that didn't stop him from wanting to kick himself.</p><p>"How much do you charge?" David muttered as he sat up and looked for his pants.</p><p>Jenny frowned. "What?"</p><p>"How much do you charge?" David repeated more loudly. The words felt dirty on his tongue.</p><p>Jenny's hair had come loose from its pins and it looked wild as she sat up and stared at him. "How could you ask me that?"</p><p>David pulled his pants on, unable to respond.</p><p>"I don't want ya to pay me, David. This didn't happen 'cause I needed money or had to do my job. I slept with ya 'cause I <em>wanted</em> to, and it meant more to me than all the money in the world. If that was supposed to be one hell of a goodbye, then it was the best damn goodbye I've ever had."</p><p>David sighed. "If things were different..."</p><p>"But they ain't," said Jenny. She searched for her fallen hairpins and gathered them up in one hand. "There's nothin' you can change, so be happy knowin' you gave me one good day to look back on. We both know we're wrong for each other, but at least we're sayin' goodbye on good terms, ain't we?"</p><p>"I suppose you're right," said David. "You're going to have to get out of here, you know. My family could be home any minute."</p><p>"I know."</p><p>They both put their appearances back in order, trying to make it look as if nothing had happened, and David kept his mind blank as he walked Jenny to the door and handed back her bonnet. He gazed into her face, trying to memorize every detail, then forced himself to open the front door.</p><p>Jenny gave him a sad smile. "Goodbye, Davey."</p><p>And then she was gone.</p><p>David tried reading again, but the words had lost their appeal and he couldn't get past the first sentence. He paced around the apartment, unable to sit still, and finally wrote a note telling his family that he was visiting friends and would return in time for supper. The streets of New York were a breath of fresh air as he left the apartment and walked outside, desperate to keep moving so he wouldn't be stuck with his thoughts, and David walked down all the usual streets he traveled when selling papers. He didn't know what to feel anymore, so he kept on walking and tried to feel nothing.</p><p>His feet carried him to Duane Street and he paused on the corner, staring at the lodging house he had visited so often. He saw a newsie, a young boy he didn't know well, traipse into the building and decided to follow him, having nowhere else to go besides home. "Is Jack around?" David asked the boy.</p><p>The kid shrugged his shoulders. "Don't think so."</p><p>"Do you know when he'll be back?"</p><p>"Nope."</p><p>The kid disappeared and David loitered around, making idle chatter with Kloppman and whatever boys happened to wander in. Skittery came strolling by, a half-smoked cigarette clutched between his fingers, and raised an eyebrow at David's presence.</p><p>"You run away from home or somethin'?"</p><p>"No," said David. "I need to talk to Jack."</p><p>"Must be trouble over a girl then," said Skittery.</p><p>"Why do you say that?"</p><p>"Usually only two reasons why one fella wants to have a talk with another: money or a girl. I'm guessin' it's a girl."</p><p>David didn't respond and watched Skittery walk away, relieved that Skittery wasn't the type of person to pry into his affairs. He didn't know how long he waited, but he was beginning to feel sleepy when a pair of boots came tramping into the lodging house and a familiar figure wearing a cowboy hat stood in front of him, a frown on his face.</p><p>"What are you doin' here, Davey?" asked Jack. He eyed David carefully and kept his distance, both hands clenched at his sides.</p><p>A few hours ago David would have willingly punched Jack in the face, or at least given him some more harsh words about his shameful behavior, but now he lacked the energy to do so. David was simply tired, not in a physical sense, but tired of thinking so hard about right and wrong, good and bad, moral and immoral.</p><p>It didn't matter anymore.</p><p>David put his hands in his pockets, knowing he wouldn't need his fists anytime soon, and walked closer to Jack so he could look him in the eye. "I'm sorry."</p><p>Jack looked taken aback, a rare expression on his usually confidant face. "Me too," he said.</p><p>"This doesn't change anything."</p><p>"I know."</p><p>David gazed at Jack for a moment, looking into the face that had caused him so much trouble, and something in Jack's eyes convinced him that they had reached an understanding. He nodded once at Jack, then turned away from him and headed for home.</p>
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<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Epilogue</h2></a>
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    <p>Jenny snuck out of her room at three o'clock in the morning, carrying a faded trunk that contained all her worldly possessions. She wouldn't need much where she was headed and she could always buy more things, if she managed to keep herself from going hungry. She crept down the hall, struggling with the weight of her trunk, and made her slow, careful way down the stairs, cringing every time the carpeted wood creaked beneath her boots. She was lucky Mrs. Johnson was a heavy sleeper, but there was no guarantee that one of the girls wouldn't wake up and catch her. Kitty would think that Christmas had come early if she found Jenny sneaking out.</p><p>She reached the bottom of the stairs and wordlessly joined the boy who waited for her in the parlor. Moonlight shown through the window, casting a faint glow upon his red suspenders, and he nodded his head in acknowledgement before taking her trunk and heading for the front door. Jenny followed him outside with as little noise as possible and stood on the doorstep of the brothel, breathing in the fresh night air.</p><p>She was free.</p><p>"You sure you wanna do this?" Spot Conlon whispered.</p><p>"Yes," Jenny whispered back, her eyes shining despite the early morning hour. "Take me away from here."</p><p>"It's a long way to Brooklyn, ya know."</p><p>Jenny didn't care. She had spent far too long trapped in Mrs. Johnson's house, catering to the whims of strangers, and she was willing to travel a hundred miles if it meant she could escape. She looked at the brothel one last time, then followed Spot down the dark, quiet street, feeling like she had been caught in a dream.</p><p>Spot had arrived in Manhattan yesterday, probably to check up on his fellow newsies, and he spent the night in Jenny's company. He seemed to know an awful lot about her situation, though nobody knew about her final goodbye to David two weeks before, and she ended up telling Spot more than she meant to. She couldn't continue her current life after David had shown her that other paths were possible. She couldn't stay in Manhattan after affecting the lives of David, Jack, and Sarah, knowing all the trouble she had unintentionally caused.</p><p>After learning about her desire to leave the brothel, Spot made the impromptu decision to take her back to Brooklyn with him. The newsboys lodging house could use a maid, since the owner was always complaining that the boys made a mess, and Jenny quickly agreed to the idea. Now she was sneaking around with Spot in the dark, heading off to her new life across the bridge. A life without the brothel, long sleepless nights, and rivalry with other girls. A life without David Jacobs, but she would forget David soon enough. A boy like him deserved better.</p><p>"What's the lodging house like?" she asked Spot as they turned a street corner.</p><p>"Quiet durin' the day," he replied. "Crowded and noisy at night. You'll be doin' most of your chores in the day, though the boys will be willin' to pay ya for a little extra work."</p><p>"I'm done with that kind of work," Jenny said flatly.</p><p>"That was a joke," said Spot.</p><p>That was also the closest he would come to apologizing. Jenny supposed she would have a lot to get used to, now that she had trusted her fate to Spot Conlon, though she suspected his gold-tipped cane and cocky manner were nothing more than props, no different than the flashy dresses and false smiles of the brothel.</p><p>"When we reach the bridge, there ain't no turnin' back," Spot told her. "I ain't takin' you back home."</p><p>"What home?" Jenny said with a wry smile. She had never had a home, never had a family that actually wanted her, and now she was traveling towards the unknown with a newsboy she barely knew. She found it strangely fitting.</p><p>The early morning wore on and most of New York continued to sleep, while a boy in red suspenders and a former prostitute headed for the Brooklyn Bridge. Jenny didn't know if her life would change for the better or the worse, but she was ready for that change and kept her eyes ahead, following Spot through the darkness.</p><p>She wouldn't look back.</p>
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